flamboyant

Chapitre 87

(six)

I now have my own palace, where I am dressed in fine silks and satins and eat delicacies.

He often came over, and the next morning he would always bestow a generous reward.

I became his new favorite, much to the envy of others.

However, the unease in my heart grew day by day, and I even felt a deep fear.

Because he never touched me.

Every time he came, he would either lean against the window playing the flute, pour himself a drink, or simply bury himself in reviewing memorials, rarely speaking to me.

I dared not sleep, nor dared I disturb him, so I could only force myself to sit on the edge of the bed and watch him.

In the moonlight, his silhouette always looked lonely and desolate, and I didn't understand why.

His life is something many people could never achieve, even in countless lifetimes.

Having founded the nation, ascended to the throne, and commanded armies across battlefields, how could he possibly have any regrets?

Or perhaps it's simply because the greed of the human heart can never be satisfied?

Before long, I understood his intention.

A rumor suddenly spread throughout the court and among the people: the reason our ancestor executed the generals who had made great military achievements was because he wanted to obtain a woman. That woman was me.

Therefore, under the Empress's threat of suicide, I was ordered to be sent to a temple to practice atonement for my sins.

Before leaving, I looked at the empress's triumphant expression and suddenly realized something.

That claim was fabricated by someone she arranged. She was afraid that if I gained favor and had a child, it would threaten their position as mother and child.

He, on the other hand, was clearly pleased with the outcome, and even had the intention to arrange it.

Because he has never trusted me. It must have been on the day we first met in the Queen's palace that he saw through my carefully feigned hatred. All these days, I've been nothing more than a little toy for him to amuse himself.

A cold laugh sneered in his heart—

Foolish woman, you're asking for trouble.

(seven)

The days of living a solitary life with only the dim light of a lamp and the ancient Buddha were not as difficult as I had imagined. I devoted myself to studying Buddhist maxims and did not step out of the temple for two years. Afterward, I began to preach, and soon my reputation grew.

What I possess is not just beauty, a fact that has long been acknowledged.

Finally, he arrived.

In recent years, he has become engrossed in Buddhism and often invites eminent monks to the palace for consultations. I was already aware of this.

He sat at the very front, only three meters away from me, his expression remaining calm, yet the clarity in his eyes grew ever stronger.

By the time it ended, the sun had set.

The host prepared a vegetarian meal for him, but I declined to attend, citing illness.

The mountain forest was very quiet at night, with only the occasional chirping of insects and the crescent moon half-hidden in the clouds.

I waited quietly on the path leading to his meditation room where he was temporarily resting, dressed in specially prepared Song Dynasty men's clothing.

He looked at me, a slight smile playing on his lips: "You are a smart woman."

I bowed and said, "Thank you for your praise, my ancestor."

"You won't regret it?"

No regrets.

"good."

After a period of pleasure, I finally became his woman.

Stroking his slanted eyebrows, I asked him, "Do you remember our meeting five years ago?"

He kissed my collarbone: "I had forgotten about you, but I remembered you again when the Empress introduced you that day."

I chuckled lightly: "I had thought you were really willing to sacrifice a great general for me."

He smirked: "I really wish I could disregard everything for a woman."

Why was his smile so self-deprecating? Why did his words sound so bleak?

"If that's the case, why don't you order an order to stop those false rumors?"

"What does it have to do with me?"

Yes, he was a completely uninhibited person, even when it came to his faith, he remained true to himself.

For example, our first sexual encounter took place in a meditation room.

May Buddha have mercy.

(eight)

I officially became his concubine, and my brother became the prime minister.

His affection for me grew stronger every day, and a year later, I gave birth to a son.

Looking at the features my son inherited from him, a pair of eyes that bore no resemblance to his appeared in my mind.

The little guy is very healthy and mischievous. Sometimes even I, his own mother, find it a bit overwhelming, but he loves him very much.

One day, while holding her son and sitting on the edge of the bed, she casually said as she tried to make him laugh, "In the future, you will definitely be a good emperor of our Great Xia, because you inherited your intelligence from me and your mother."

My heart skipped a beat. I stole a glance at him, but he remained calm and composed, showing no sign of anything amiss.

Why did you suddenly say that? Is it because you've noticed something, or do you really have this plan?

A sudden, inexplicable unease arose, keeping me tossing and turning, unable to sleep.

A few days later, I sent someone to summon my brother to the palace. Unexpectedly, my brother did not arrive, but instead witnessed a major upheaval in the palace.

The Crown Prince injured my grandfather. The Prime Minister led his men to arrest the Crown Prince. My grandfather immediately ordered the Empress and the Crown Prince to be deposed and imprisoned for investigation.

At that moment, my whole body was burning hot, but my blood instantly turned ice cold.

(Nine)

His injuries deteriorated rapidly and were beyond saving.

I knelt at the head of his bed and took the official seal.

"Killing the general who held considerable military power and harbored ambitions to declare himself king was for the sake of national stability, and I have no regrets. It is understandable that you hate me. However, I did not want you to remain trapped in hatred, which is why I devised a plan to send you away. Yet, you insisted on returning. At that moment, I suddenly realized that perhaps you were suited to this court, suited to those struggles. In that case, I will grant your wish... I will not let you down, because I love seeing your carefree smile..."

Laugh? Over the years, when have I ever genuinely smiled at him?

I looked up in surprise and saw that his eyebrows were curved, and his eyes, no longer clear as if shrouded in white mist, were gazing out the window, where hundreds of flowers were in full bloom.

"Do you know why this place is called 'Beyond the Palace'? Because you said you came from a faraway place..."

I held his hand; it was as cold as ice and snow.

A tear fell, slid down the back of my hand, and landed in his palm.

I cried. I actually cried for him. Why...?

Holding my son as I ascended the throne, I looked down at my subjects prostrate on the ground, but a void seemed to be endlessly expanding in my heart, as if it would never stop for eternity.

I finally understand where that loneliness and desolation come from.

I once swore that if you killed my husband, I would take your kingdom.

Now, I've finally done it.

Don't worry, I will continue to protect the Great Xia for you.

With my heart, which can never be filled again.

My ancestor, Yuanhao.

(over)