Lanting

Capítulo 79

I gently pulled her into my arms. "I know you feel sorry for me, but for some reason, I feel even more sorry for her."

Chapter 41 Embarrassment

I parted ways with Consort Rong only at the Imperial Garden, heading north back to Yonghe Palace. Stepping inside, I saw Princess Yongning, newly married, chatting and laughing with Consort Ding, her husband sitting beside her. Yongning had grown up without a mother, raised by Consort Ding for many years. I remembered seeing her when she was just over ten; in three or four years, she had blossomed into a beautiful young woman. The Emperor had always doted on this daughter. Now, she was marrying into the prestigious Qiao family of the capital. Her husband, Qiao Junzhi, was the Vice Minister of Revenue, highly regarded by the court. I knew from my time at Prince Ning's residence that he and Lu Li had a close relationship. Lu Li didn't have many confidants, but Qiao Junzhi was one of them; they often had pleasant conversations and a deep bond. Now, with their marriage, they were naturally overjoyed. Lu Li, having heard that her husband was at Yonghe Palace, had returned from court and came specifically to see Qiao Junzhi. The two chatted briefly at the Duolai Pavilion in Yonghe Palace.

Consort Ding was feeling unwell and a bit tired, so she sent me to take Yongning to the courtyard to relieve her boredom. Yongning was a very enthusiastic person, and after a few words, she dragged me around looking for fun. In the end, she took Zhi'er with her to fly kites. I couldn't help but smile from the bottom of my heart as I watched the two of them, one big and one small, being so affectionate like sisters.

After Yongning returned with the prince consort, he finally had a short time alone with Lu Li. Perhaps he had drunk too much, as he was somewhat tipsy. I told him to rest in the warm pavilion for a while and helped him take off his robe. He glanced at me and asked, "Are you still angry with me?"

"I wouldn't dare," I said irritably.

"Is the palace more comfortable than home?"

I smiled slightly, "It's more carefree than that courtyard."

His gaze darted away slightly as he looked at me, then he closed his eyes and remained silent. I smiled, about to walk away, but stopped and turned back to look at him. He opened his eyes slightly, but didn't look at me, only saying, "Come here, shall we talk?"

I didn't refuse. I sat down next to him on the edge of the bed, a helpless smile on my face. "I happen to have something to say too."

He then looked at me, wanting to hear me finish what I had to say.

"I've already said it, so don't object."

"You go first."

“You’ve taken Xiaoyu as your concubine, haven’t you?” I stared at him. He should be able to tell. I wasn’t joking at all.

He opened his mouth slightly, then frowned incredulously. Before he could utter a single word, I cut him off.

“I know. You might say I don’t have the right to beg your mother and father for women like I did with Lan Ruo back then. I’m just pretending not to know. If it were Yao Shuhuan now, Xiaoyu probably wouldn’t even live to see tomorrow. That’s why I came to discuss this with you. Wouldn’t it be better if you asked for it first, before Yao Shuhuan realizes what’s going on?”

Lu Li frowned deeply. He didn't react for a long time. "Am I drunk and not understanding? Or are you just not explaining? What kind of nonsense is this?"

“Whether you understand or not, you can’t shirk your responsibilities. Don’t you?” I said with a sigh. “There are so many people in this world willing to bear your children. In the future, I’ll surely have a house full of grandchildren, and my knees will be filled with joy. But…”

He turned his face away, avoiding my gaze. His voice came coldly. "Just what—"

I smiled and said, "However, even if you don't care about your own health, you should at least consider the dignity of the royal family."

His expression gradually stiffened. He turned around and examined me carefully, then raised one hand and pinched my cheek. "It really startled me to hear the word 'decency' from your mouth."

I pushed his hand away, suppressing my anger, and said, "The respectability I'm talking about means you shouldn't get someone pregnant before marrying them and lose face."

He paused, his brow furrowed, and asked in a low voice, "What's wrong with you—"

"It's been six months... You can't deny it now... It's also a pity that the girl is hiding it, so I told you to be careful and not make me keep cleaning up your messes."

He squinted, slowly leaning closer. I suppressed my disdainful smile. A spark of anger flashed in his eyes. He abruptly stood up, strode to the door, opened it, and glanced back at me. "You really are—magnanimous."

These words seemed to jolt me awake. I threw the jade pillow beside me, and it landed on the ground with a "thud," shattering into several pieces, but I didn't care.

“I am magnanimous—” My voice was far more violent than the sound of the stove shattering. “I am so magnanimous that I clean up your messes, so magnanimous that I gave up my position to be your concubine, and even if I was misunderstood, I would still help you protect the women you had favored, regardless of whether I could save face or whether you would understand. But listen to me, I accept serving you with many women. If this is my fate, I will grit my teeth and accept it—but don’t expect me to be devoted to you.”

His eyes were gleaming. Without even looking at me, he pulled the door shut, peered into the doorway, and then closed it again. This series of actions confused me.

Seeing that there was no one outside the door, he felt relieved and came back. He glanced at the broken pieces on the ground, shook his head with a light laugh, and sat down next to me again. "Fine, it's better for you to argue with me like this than to give me the cold shoulder. But no matter how magnanimous you are, there's no reason for you to pin everything on me."

"Fine, keep pretending." I didn't even bother to look at him.

“I know about Xiaoyu’s health.” He nodded. “Although she hasn’t told me, I’m in charge of the Imperial Hospital, and I’m the one who suppressed her matter. But as for the responsibility you mentioned, I really can’t bear it.”

I glanced at him and nodded. "You did a good job this time." With that, I got out of bed, put on my robe, and sat down at the table.

"It wasn't me." He lowered his voice, somewhat embarrassed. "If it really were my child, how could I not take responsibility? Do you think I don't know whether I touched her or not?"

I was taken aback, then smiled casually, "Who would believe that?"

"You really don't trust me?" He frowned slightly and strolled over.

I rolled my eyes at him. "Yes, I believe you. But how did Lan Ruo get that body? And how did Yao Shuhuan get the child she lost?"

His face grew increasingly pale, as if my question had rendered him speechless.

"Anyway!" I waved my hand. "I'm not going to argue with you, and don't try to reason with me. You're going to feel so good about losing face after I called you out on you?"

He stopped talking, noticed a cup of tea on the table, and reached for it. I was quick; I caught it before him, picked up the cup, and brought it to my lips, stealing glances at him every now and then.

He smiled faintly and shook his head. "If you insist on putting this label on me, I'll accept it. But I really don't need to fight with others for my son."

I put down my teacup and looked at Lu Li's slightly helpless yet leisurely appearance. He was indeed not being humble.

Could it really not be him?

Lu Li stood up and opened the window. "After all that commotion, I'm almost sober. Let's pack up and go back to the manor together. Yin'er keeps asking me for you. If you don't go back soon, the other courtyard will be turned upside down by those two little troublemakers."

Back at the manor, I was in a daze, often lost in thought about Xiaoyu. Not long after, the Emperor's decree arrived, bestowing upon me the title of Lady of Ningguo, a rank of third grade. I completely forgot how the people in the manor celebrated.

Qin Lanruo's pregnancy made it increasingly difficult for her to care for the children, so she agreed to let Lu Li send Zhi'er over. Zhi'er and Yin'er got along very well, and later Jingrui insisted on staying with me, refusing to leave. Zhen'er also frequently visited Zhi'er during the day, and Jing Qing would regularly come and cause a ruckus, turning my courtyard into a veritable village of children. The noise often made it impossible for Lu Li to study here, and he would have to frown and gesture for me to send them away. I would just make a gesture of invitation, indicating that he should find a quiet place himself.

The medicine Qiu Ming had been searching for hadn't arrived yet. Usually, the cook in the manor would deliver messages for Qiu Ming every three days, but five days had passed. Just as someone was sent to find the cook, news came that he had gone home to visit family, making it clear the situation was complicated.

“Aunt Yan—” Zhen’er held up the book and handed it to me. “This is my new work. Father said it still needs some polishing. What did you learn from it, Aunt Yan?”

I'd barely taken it and glanced at it when Zhi'er tugged at my sleeve, "Auntie, Auntie, milk cake, milk cake—"

"How many times have I told you?!" Yin'er glared at Zhi'er from the side. "You should call my mother Aunt Yan. Keep calling her Aunt, Aunt."

Zhi'er pouted, and I was about to bend down to comfort her. Jingrui, who couldn't see me and couldn't squeeze in, also burst into tears. Helplessly, I looked around for someone to help me, but then I saw her and Jingqing chatting and laughing privately not far away. I sighed. Raising sons doesn't guarantee support in old age, and raising daughters is useless.

Just as they were racking their brains, they heard someone coughing softly at the entrance of the courtyard, their face grim. "What kind of state are these people in?"

Among the many children, only Zhi'er and Yin'er were not afraid of the person in front of them. Zhi'er never took this father seriously and kept pestering me. Yin'er took a few steps over and put her arm around Lu Li's leg. Lu Li's feigned seriousness immediately collapsed, and he pretended to pick up Yin'er. I laughed and joked, "Yesterday I asked you to hold Jing Rui. Who said we should hold our grandchildren but not our children?"

Lu Li awkwardly withdrew his hand, glanced at the beautiful scenery in the courtyard, sighed, and instructed, "Zhen'er, go back to the front yard and revise that article. Jingqing, your sedan chair is already waiting outside. Siliang, take Jingrui down to clean his painted face. Zhi'er..." Lu Li looked at his daughter who wouldn't even glance at him, and couldn't help but frown, "Zhi'er, are you even listening to your father?"

Ignoring my cries, Zhi'er continued shaking my leg, "Milk cake, milk cake..."

I quickly gave Lu Li a way out, saying to the children, "You all pack up, those who need to study should study, those who need to rest should rest, and everyone can go home now."

Lu Li stared at Zhi'er the whole way, shaking his head in confusion, "But I've spoiled him too much, and this child doesn't even respect me."

I laughed and pulled his gaze back. "I told you you lack authority, but you still won't admit it."

Lu Li entered the room and sat down at the table. "I want to find a teacher for Yin'er."

“I teach my own son myself. I taught Zhen’er when he didn’t have a teacher.” I don’t want my precious son to suffer and be scolded by the old man.

"I'll go along with you for now. I'll find someone else when you're no longer interested in managing things." He knew my personality well enough not to press me further. He took a sip of tea and finally got to the point, "I heard you've been looking for someone lately?"

"Yes." I knew this was related to him, so I didn't try to hide it. "I can't find the cook who usually helps me deliver letters."

“I sent him back to his hometown.”

“Since I entered your household, you have blocked more than twenty letters, so why did you manage to send them away this time?”

“He brought something he shouldn’t have into my residence. Do you think he can stay here any longer?” Lu Li gave me a reproachful look. “Not punishing him is already showing mercy.”

"You can't blame him for this. How would he know what it was?" I pouted, quite dissatisfied that Lu Li had seen through the matter.

"Then tell me what it is." He didn't look up at me, but instead picked up the ledger that I had only glanced at halfway through and started flipping through it.

"You already know, why are you asking?" His nonchalant attitude left me somewhat unsure of how much he had actually understood.

"I'm asking what you need that thing for?"

"I want Qin Lanruo to miscarry. I'm jealous, I'm envious, I'm vicious." I said very seriously, but he didn't listen at all. He even marked a few unclear accounts on the ledger, which made me very angry.

"Finished editing? Keep editing." He didn't even look up, speaking calmly.

"I... I actually prepared this for Xiaoyu. I want to protect her."

“I know you gave her throat lozenges. Change the story.”

I gritted my teeth. How did he know all this?! Suppressing my anger, I took a deep breath and said with a forced smile, "I need to discuss something with you."

He finally looked up from the ledger. "Tell me about it first."

"Can I kill someone?" I asked, still sporting a bright, sunny smile.

"Who is it?" His head returned to the ledger.

"Our child." Because the smile was so fake, the corners of his mouth were unnecessarily twitching.

With a "thud," he fell to the ground, along with the account book and the chair.

Chapter 42 Battle of Magic

"Nonsense!" He immediately uttered these two words after settling back into his seat.

I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye. Did he think that just because he controlled the Imperial Hospital, he could control everything?! It was time to turn on him. I pushed aside the ledger in front of me and looked at him seriously, saying, "You bribed the cook after the fifth letter I exchanged with Qiu Ming. But I continued to have the cook report to you about my meetings and communications with Qiu Ming. I don't like doing things secretly, and I'm not afraid of being caught. Even if I'm aboveboard, I'm sure I'll win. Physician Xu wouldn't keep my pulse readings from you. No matter how much money I bribed him, he's still loyal to you. You're lucky to have such a servant. Of course, I have plenty of servants like that too. The cook is one of them. He betrayed me and sided with you only after I gave him my tacit approval. The only difference between us is that I can see the loyalty of your servants, but you can't see the utter despair of mine."

He gripped the ledger tightly in one hand, holding it more and more firmly, without uttering a sound.

“I asked Qiu Ming for abortion pills, you know that.” I stared at him intently. “What you don’t know is that I used the cook to let you know my every move and what Qiu Ming sent into the manor. I wanted to tell you that the game is almost over and nothing can stop me, not even my own flesh and blood.”

“Just a child without any power.” His voice was hollow.

I closed my eyes tightly. "Don't tell me he won't get in my way, and don't say he's innocent. He's not innocent at all. Because of you, he was destined to die young, wasn't he? He's not your child; he's just a pawn you used to bind me."

"Why do you have to think this way?" He was tired, and you could hear the weariness in his voice.

“This child is different from Zhi’er. Zhi’er was a legitimate son that you promised me. But this child is one that you forced upon me.” I suddenly opened my eyes. “He is also different from the child in Qin Lanruo’s womb. That was your promise to her. I know you are a person who values promises. What I know even more is that you never dare to make any promises to me. You are afraid that you cannot give them.”

I suddenly loosened my grip on the ledger, knowing that I had struck a chord with him. The ledger was completely disfigured, and his hand was trembling slightly.

I let out a soft breath. "You ordered Physician Xu to add fertility-enhancing supplements to my diet. You desperately crave this life that can change the fate of many. You want me to bear you a child, not as repayment, nor as a sign of your deep affection, but simply because we need a child, or rather, because you need this child to save your people. This will become an insurmountable obstacle for me. For you, it's an opportunity; for me, it's a curse. I could have stopped all of this from happening, but I've given in to your wishes. You want this life? Fine, I'll give it to you, and then destroy it with my own hands. I don't want to disappoint you, so I'll give you despair. This time, you've misjudged me. I'm far more ruthless than you imagine. Anything that gets in my way, I'll destroy myself. I've spent my whole life as someone else's pawn; such a life is meaningless. If my child is also to be a pawn, I'd rather eliminate him myself. I killed him, but it was you, his well-intentioned father, who harmed him."

The wind picked up, and the doors and windows suddenly swung open. I walked out expressionlessly, and the wind whipped up sand, blurring my vision.

The candlelight in the study of the main courtyard burned for three days and nights. The mansion remained silent for three days. No one dared approach the study. Even Xiao Si, who was used to serving them, stood three steps away from the study, waiting.

The atmosphere in the mansion was tense. Even the usually gossipy maids in each courtyard dared not utter a sound. Consort Rong sent a sedan chair to fetch me. I only gave Siliang a brief instruction before heading straight to the palace.

The side hall of Qianruo Palace was quiet, yet somewhat restless. Xiaoyu had also been invited by Consort Rong to eat fruit. As soon as she saw me, she smiled slightly. "Did you quarrel with the Seventh Prince again? Looking for a quiet place to hide away?"

"Oh. It happens all the time." I laughed freely, peeling a tangerine in my hand. "It did get noisy. But it's just everyday life. It's not about seeking peace and quiet. Right now, the most peaceful place in the Prince's Mansion is anyway."

Consort Rong smiled at me as well. "There are rumors in the palace too. Seventh Prince has had a gloomy face for three days in a row. Even the Emperor doesn't dare to ask him for advice in court."

"It's rare to see Seventh Master so angry," Xiaoyu sighed. "He's always been a good-tempered person."

"I'm not thinking about him right now." I handed Xiaoyu the peeled orange segments. "I'm worried about you."

Xiaoyu nodded and remained silent.

I sighed and glanced at her stomach. "Could it really not be Lu Li's?"

Xiaoyu was startled, staring at me with her eyes almost popping out. "You...you actually think of me like that? No matter how good Seventh Master is, not everyone can reach him!"