Глупый агент - Глава 32

Глава 32

The poor, bearded Arab bandit was nailed to a board of nails, looking like a gecko pinned to a wall, groaning in pain. Several nails were stuck into his face and forehead, and he was clearly doomed. As his body twisted strangely, blood dripped incessantly from the nails.

This action stunned him and his gang of thugs, who involuntarily took a few steps back, staring blankly at the human flesh pancake under the nail board. The tall, thin man who had been rambling on the plane even stepped on my instep, causing me to shove him hard in pain. He actually glanced back at me, his face pale, before turning back to look at the human flesh pancake without uttering a sound.

Yegev's face turned even paler. He strode forward, silently uttered "Allah," turned back, and with a gun in hand, shot the bearded man in the heart, ending the life of this poor Muslim who had money to be made but no life to enjoy it.

Then, Yegev snatched the shovel from the bearded corpse—these digging tools were farm implements they had casually stolen from the old couple's hut earlier—looked around carefully, and unable to determine if there were any traps or hidden weapons, he could only walk back with a gloomy shrug.

Just then, the tall, thin bandit turned around, grabbed me, and shoved me in front of Yegev. He smiled mysteriously and pointed at me. Damn it, I knew without a doubt that this guy wanted me to be a stepping stone and explore the tomb passage ahead.

A sly glint appeared in Yegov's eyes. He nodded and watched me retreat. A series of clanking sounds followed as the black man and the short white man simultaneously drew their guns and advanced towards me.

"A bunch of bumpkins, idiots, bastards," I cursed inwardly. I turned my head with disdain, shrugged at Yegev, and pointed to the shovel in his hand.

Yegev paused, looked at me and then at the shovel in his hand, smiled, and handed it to me. Before letting go, he gave me a meaningful look and made a cutting motion.

I understood; he was warning me to kill him on sight if I made any sudden moves. I nonchalantly shook my head and walked step by step toward the stone door. Four guns were pointed at me from behind, but a glimmer of hope surged within me as I plotted how to use the tomb's mechanisms to escape.

I carefully observed the stone gate and realized that the bearded Arab man had not pushed the gate, but had accidentally triggered a ground mechanism, which led to his death.

It seemed the mechanism on the door hadn't been broken yet. I carefully poked the wall with my shovel, but seeing nothing amiss, I took two steps back. As soon as I touched the floorboard that the bearded man had stepped on, suddenly, a rake-toothed nail board flew out from the other side of the wall with a gust of wind and embedded itself into the opposite stone wall.

I leaned back, narrowly avoiding the flying spikes, and fell to the ground with a thud. I got up and saw a hint of approval in Yegov's eyes, but in the blink of an eye he glared at me fiercely and brandished his gun, urging me to go again.

With Yegev's ancestors scurrying through my mind, I slowly walked forward, touched the mechanism floor with my shovel again, and breathed a sigh of relief. This time, no rake flew out.

I walked quietly to the door, then peeked up at the top, noticing the marks of a heavy gate. The stone door itself was completely blank, without even a small air bubble, unusually clean. I pretended to look around, dawdling, but didn't actually touch it.

Yegev got impatient, shouted twice, and when I didn't react, he swung his gun and fired. The bullet grazed past me and hit the door, sending sparks flying.

I quickly jumped back, pretending to be startled, and dodged to the side. But the stone door didn't move at all, the heavy gate didn't fall, and no other mechanisms were triggered. It seemed that there were no other mechanisms on the door besides the one that connected to the heavy gate.

Yegov yelled at me fiercely, and I pretended to suddenly understand, waving my hand and rushing forward. I was ready to risk my life. Reaching the door, I sprang up, crashing through the stone doorway. Just as the door opened, the jack slammed shut, creating a gust of wind that blocked the doorway. I could hear Yegov's shouts, and outside, bullets from submachine guns and pistols clattered against the jack's stone slab like a torrential rain.

I crashed into the ground through the stone gate with a thud, landing on my shoulder first. I grimaced from the impact, and half of my body was numb.

After a moment, I reached out and touched the shovel. I quickly got up and groped my way forward in the dark. After a few steps, I stopped. My eyes were still not fully adjusted to the darkness and needed a few minutes to adjust.

I squatted on the ground, clamping the shovel between my legs, and desperately rubbed the thin steel chain of the handcuffs between my hands against the head of the shovel.

Using the sparks from the fire, I gradually made out the black hole ahead. It was an extremely spacious palace, with white marble pillars standing tall in the center. The walls were covered with huge carved patterns, including traces of ancient kings and queens receiving homage and going on tours, as well as other battle reliefs of foreign female warriors wearing pheasant feathers on their heads and missing half of their breasts, fighting against Greek cavalry, and even strange and exotic beast patterns.

I inadvertently turned to the center of the hall and was startled. I vaguely saw a huge centaur leaping around in the hall, as if preparing to accelerate, moving silently and staring at me with its two strange eyes.

I was terrified. I stopped grinding the handcuffs and sat there blankly, surrounded by endless darkness. I could almost hear the monster sneezing and charging towards me.

Just then, a loud bang came from behind me, and the huge shockwave knocked me over several times, causing me to fall to the floor.

Volume Two, Four Kingdoms Campaign, Chapter Sixty-Four: The Divine Beast of the Mausoleum of Halicarnassus

I hurriedly crawled on the ground and looked back. I saw dust everywhere, and the sluice gate had been torn open with a large gash. Someone was waving a flashlight and climbing in through the crack from above.

It was a short, white thug. Damn it, Yegev used explosives outside the door; maybe a grenade blew up the heavy gate, because the whole hall shook.

I crawled to my feet when suddenly the sound of galloping hooves came from behind me. Damn it, it was that half-man, half-horse monster. I rolled to the side and tumbled into a corner next to a stone pillar. But then I saw the monster leap past me and charge at the short white man who had just crawled in and the tall black man who was still climbing.

The short white man, holding a powerful flashlight, shone it in surprise into the hall upon hearing the noise. He saw the enormous centaur charging towards him and screamed in terror, falling under the heavy gate. Trembling, he raised his pistol and fired three shots in quick succession.

The monster suddenly stood on its hind legs, raised its front hooves, and dodged to the side. Two wings suddenly spread out from the sides of its body and slapped the little man, who was slapped into a corner of the wall and crashed into a stone slab, where he immediately lost consciousness.

Seeing that things were going badly, the big black guy desperately squeezed out the front half of his body, hanging upside down in the crack. He forcefully pulled out the submachine gun slung across his body, supported himself with his left hand on the ground, held the gun in his right hand, and struggled to raise his head, firing a burst of bullets at the horse's body. The bullets hit the lower half of the monster's body and chest, causing it to stagger back several steps.

The monster let out a shrill scream, raised its front hooves, and stomped down hard, crushing the large black head into a bloody gourd shape. The head hung limply from its neck, almost falling off, and it was clear that it was doomed.

The human-headed, horse-bodied monster gushed green blood from its chest, turned around, spread its two-meter-long wings, and silently glided into the shadows behind the hall. This unusual behavior nearly made my eyes pop out.

Seeing the monster fly away, I scrambled out from behind the pillar, picked up the flashlight and the pistol from the corner of the wall, and kicked him hard in the head. The little guy didn't even groan before collapsing against the wall.

I thought to myself, "Damn it, at least sleep for another half hour. Maybe when you wake up, you'll think that monster stepped on you."

The thought of cursing myself made me spit twice. Just as I was about to draw my gun and shoot off the handcuffs on my hands, suddenly, a large, dark corpse was shoved in through the gaping wound. A pistol was thrust in and started firing wildly, bullets whizzing by, almost hitting me.

I flinched in fright, almost forgetting that those two bastards, Yegev, were still outside. I fired a shot with my backhand, hitting his wrist squarely. A scream came from the gash, the pistol fell to the ground, and his wrist snapped back. I fired several more shots in quick succession, the bullets whizzing and flying wildly from the gash.

Seeing that no one was at the crack, I drew my gun and broke the thin chain of my handcuffs. I tiptoed over, took the submachine gun from the big, dark-skinned corpse, picked up the pistol that had fallen, and fired two shots at the crack. I crouched down and ran back, hiding behind a stone pillar. I thought to myself, "Now I have plenty of ammunition." I breathed a sigh of relief.

Just then, a round object was suddenly thrown in through the crack and rolled to the ground. I shone my flashlight on it and saw it hissing and emitting white smoke. Damn it, it was a grenade. That Yegev is really vicious.

I hurriedly scrambled behind the stone pillar. With a deafening roar, smoke billowed out, blasting a large crater in the floor. Shards of stone flew everywhere, clanging and rattling against the stone pillar in front of me.

Yegev threw in several more grenades, turning the hall into a smoke-filled, mining-like mess. I was furious. I tucked my double pistols into my belt, turned off my flashlight, picked up my submachine gun, aimed at the guy who had managed to crawl in through the crack, and fired a burst, killing him right there in the crack. Judging from his build and appearance, I recognized him as that tall, skinny, talkative Arab thug.

The hall was eerily quiet, both inside and out. I hid behind a stone pillar and shone my powerful flashlight into the hall. I saw a golden throne deep inside, clearly set up according to the layout of his reign. There was nothing particularly unusual about it, except that the hall was covered with gleaming reliefs, displaying extreme extravagance.

The blood of the centaur dripped down the floor and into a purple jade screen behind the throne, where there was likely an exit.

I thought to myself that instead of wasting time like this, it would be better to back down cleanly. I've already taken my revenge, so why fight to the death with Yegev? As long as I can escape, that's enough.

I raised my submachine gun, fired a burst at the crack, and then took the opportunity to slip behind the purple jade screen, leaving that old devil Yelav to wait.

Turning around the screen, I discovered a hidden door behind it, the bloodstains of a human head and a horse's body dripping down the path to the door. I gently pushed open the hidden door, and a stone staircase sloping down in front of me appeared. Shining a strong flashlight down, I saw only pools of thick, congealed green blood.

I turned and closed the hidden door, then walked down the stone steps into the cave. A pungent, musty smell assaulted my nostrils. I accidentally stepped into the bloodstains of a centaur, and found myself unable to pull my foot away from the sticky mess, the sole of my shoe sizzling and corroding. I quickly pulled away, shoving my foot hard against the stone steps to wipe off the sticky blood; the green stain resembled mold.

After rounding a bend, the tunnel leveled out, and soon a hidden door appeared. I turned off my flashlight and pressed myself against the wall. I gently opened the door a crack, but the room was completely dark, and I couldn't see anything inside.

I slipped inside, groping my way along the walls in the darkness. Before I'd taken more than a few steps, a sudden gust of wind swept past me, knocking me to the ground and sending me tumbling a considerable distance. Before I could even get up, another gust of wind rushed towards me, something grabbed me, and lifted me into the air, chuckling eerily. In the darkness, I imagined it was a gigantic winged monster—could it be a pterosaur?

Without thinking twice, I grabbed my submachine gun and swung it overhead at close range. The monster screamed in pain, abruptly releasing its massive claws, and I was thrown heavily to the ground, rolling a considerable distance. I switched on my high-powered flashlight and, holy crap, saw a winged, human-bodied, horse-headed monster flying around the ceiling, yelling.

I fired a whole magazine of bullets into the monster's body, spurting green blood everywhere. The human-bodied, horse-headed monster screamed, spun around, and flew diagonally, landing on something not far away.

I turned the flashlight around and, holy crap, the human-bodied, horse-headed monster was dripping green liquid onto the same monster from before. The two monsters had four wings flapping around them. At first glance, it looked like an abstract work by a surrealist painter. The horse's head was towering high on its back, and human heads and bodies were folded over its neck. What kind of concept is this? I'm dizzy. I thought, even if I told Fatty Wang about it after we got out, he wouldn't believe me.

I was stunned and secretly moved to retreat behind the stone pillar. But as soon as I moved my foot, the centaur saw me and pounced on the ground, carrying the centaur on its back. With its four wings spread, it flew towards me.

This was really difficult to handle. I frantically swung my submachine gun at them, and the two monsters suddenly separated, attacking me from the left and right flanks. I leaned against the stone pillar, constantly firing at them, but I couldn't protect the left side, and suddenly I was swatted to the floor by a wing from the huge centaur monster.

Seeing it kicking and stomping, I rolled around, struggling to keep up. The submachine gun shots I fired at them only left small wounds, not fatal ones.

Alas, I am now fighting alone, even a hero cannot withstand four hands—it's clearly eight hands (hoof)! I am retreating step by step, rolling on the ground, and soon my life will be over. I sigh inwardly, "To die before achieving one's goal, leaving heroes to weep with sorrow!"

To make matters worse, my submachine gun ran out of bullets while I was firing. I pulled the trigger twice, but both times it went blank. Damn it, it seems like fate is against me; even my submachine gun is messing with me. I aimed at the centaur and threw it at it, but the submachine gun missed. Instead, the centaur, which was following me like a ghost, swooped down and snatched it away with a flap of its wings.

The monster with a human body and a horse's head raised its gun and pulled the trigger, but before it could fire, it casually threw the gun far away, towards the stone gate behind it.

Suddenly, a cry of pain rang out, and the empty submachine gun struck a man on the head through the crack in the door—it was Yegov, who had sneaked in quietly. He clutched his forehead, and just as he rubbed his eyes, the human-bodied, horse-headed monster charged at him.

At first glance, it looked like a strange man charging forward. Yegev had never seen anything like it before. He fired two shots but they had no effect. In a panic, he turned around and tried to run away, but the human-bodied, horse-headed monster grabbed him by the hand, held him under his arm, and with a grotesque laugh, flew into the air, spinning and twirling around.

While I was struggling to fight the centaur, I was also thinking that the villain Yegev would finally get his just deserts and die before me.

Unexpectedly, just as the horse-headed, human-bodied monster flying in mid-air was about to open its huge mouth to devour Yegev's head, Yegev, this ruthless character, suddenly lit a grenade and stretched his own arm into the horse's mouth in front of him. The horse's head bit off his arm, and Yegev took the opportunity to fall to the ground.

Immediately, the head of the human-bodied, horse-headed monster that was flying in mid-air suddenly exploded. After a loud bang, rain of blood and flesh fell from the sky and landed on the ground. The human body that had lost its horse head also fell straight down and landed with a thud, motionless.

Upon seeing this, the centaur, which was attacking me, let out a mournful cry, and large tears streamed from its horse-like eyes. It then turned and charged toward Yegov, who had fallen to the floor.

Yegev was thrown around and was still dizzy. Before he could get up, the charging centaur trampled his only left arm with a crack. He screamed in agony and fainted.

The man-headed, horse-bodied monster was still not satisfied. It kept curling its tail and raising its hooves, running back and forth on Yegka, just like a horse being trained on a racetrack. Its four hooves were flying, and Yegka's head was flattened and he was no longer human. Even his mother probably wouldn't recognize him like that.

The human-headed, horse-bodied monster cried out in anguish as it rushed to the side of its companion's remaining human body. It slowly bent its hooves and knelt down, bowing its head and wailing loudly. Its cries were like the mournful cry of a cuckoo, like the nightingale's lament. How could it bear such sorrow! Even I was stunned, and tears unknowingly streamed down my face.

Just then, a figure rushed in from outside, charging towards the centaur. I looked closely and saw it was the short, white thug I had knocked unconscious. He hadn't seen me; carrying a grenade and a money box, he lunged at the centaur, clinging to its back and laughing maniacally, "I have five million spirit coins! I have a US green card!" In the light of his hand, I saw his face contorted in a mad, insane expression; he had clearly been driven insane by fear.

The human-headed, horse-bodied monster, already feeling sorrowful, was startled and enraged. It leaped up, its wings barely unfurled, before it could even take flight. A deafening roar followed, and the grenade in the small man's hand exploded, blasting both man and horse into a bloody mess, which then collapsed to the ground.

I rubbed my bruised and swollen shoulder, which had been kicked and trampled by the human-headed horse-bodied monster, and got up. I staggered over to them and, by the light of my flashlight, saw that the little one had been blown to pieces and its limbs were separated.

In a pool of red and green blood, the human head of the horse-bodied monster was still struggling, ready to move. I was startled and took two steps back, using my pistol to clear away the bloodstains. I discovered that the monster's head was actually the face of an ancient man, with blood-red eyes, blue pupils, black hair and beard, a prominent nose, and regular, dignified features. The head was not dead yet; it blinked, gave me a cold look, then suddenly sighed, closed its eyes, and remained motionless.

His long sigh startled me again; it was clearly a man's sigh. A large hole had been blasted into its horse-like body, its internal organs spilling out – the very organs of a horse.

Unable to resist my curiosity, I went to examine the long-dead horse-headed monster. The horse's head had been blown into a half-buried wooden dome, making it impossible to examine closely. However, the complete human body was dressed in a black silk robe, and all four limbs were human. I guessed that this body must be the body of the man's head. I casually lifted the rope buckle on the chest and took a look. Oh my god, I was so scared that I fell down on the floor.

I steadied myself and lifted the clothes again. The body was wearing a red undergarment (also called a bodice or red bellyband, which was used as a substitute for a bra by women in ancient times) on the front. The breasts were high and the skin was delicate. It was clearly the body of an adult woman.

Now I'm really confused. It seems this isn't what I imagined. How can there be such creatures, and there's no sign of them being artificially mummified? A male and a female monster—are they siblings, or lovers?

Without time to investigate further, I stood up and looked around with a puzzled expression. As usual, the hall was built entirely of white marble. However, not far away, there was a white marble coffin. Unlike the throne in the main hall, when I shone a strong flashlight on it, the coffin shone brightly and was more than twice the size of an ordinary coffin.

I approached the coffin, pondering whether I should open it. The thought of the two strange corpses lying on the ground almost made me lose my courage. What if another monster jumped out of the coffin?

After standing quietly for a while, my professional habits as a tomb raider kicked in, and I subconsciously patted the pistol at my waist, gritted my teeth, grabbed the flashlight, and with a burst of strength, pushed open the coffin lid.

After a pause, seeing no movement, I cautiously approached the coffin and peered inside with my flashlight. I saw a thick layer of ice inside, with only a small, exquisite metal box at the bottom, neither copper nor iron.

I leaned inside, and the moment I touched the metal box, a penetrating chill seeped into my fingers, making me shiver. It was so cold! What was this thing? I jumped off the coffin, warmed my hands with my breath, and hopped around a few times to get rid of the cold from my fingers.

I leaned in again and found another slightly larger metal box inside the coffin. I pried it out from under the ice and found it empty. I tried to pry off the ice around the box with my pistol and flipped it into the slightly larger box of the same metal material. It fit perfectly. I put the lid on the barrel of the gun and reached in to take it out. Thankfully, I only felt a slight chill.

I put the metal box in my pocket, jumped off the coffin, closed the lid, and prepared to return the way I came. When I shone my flashlight, I discovered another inconspicuous hidden door in the corner.

After hesitating for a moment, I pushed open the hidden door with my gun and found another grand hall behind it. However, the interior of this hall was very different. There were bright red curtains and a gentle double stone bed, resembling a woman's boudoir. No, it was more like the palace of a queen.

Even more amazingly, there was a stone dressing table next to the bed, filled with hairpins, jewels, and jewelry, all gleaming brightly and dazzling the eye.

At this point, I was certain that this was the sleeping palace of a queen. Recalling everything, I couldn't help but smile. Could this be the resting place of that queen with a male head and a horse's body and a horse's face? Imagining the two of them—no, the two monsters—living in perfect harmony, inseparable, enjoying a blissful life under the flowers and the moon, I was mesmerized.

I looked around and found that the Sleeping Palace was quite well-equipped, even having trunks filled with black robes made of pure silk. Finally, I discovered another narrow, hidden door inside the stone bed, or more accurately, a hidden cave, only wide enough for one person to crawl through. I figured those two strange men definitely couldn't have made it out.

I crawled up to my upper body, then retreated, ran back to the dressing table, and reluctantly picked out the most antique-looking jade hairpin from the pile of jewelry, tucking it into my bosom.

"I'll take a gift to Shirley Yang," I thought happily. Turning around, I said to the hall, "Don't be offended if it's strange; just keep it as a souvenir. If Fatty Wang comes, he'll take all your jewels. I'm an honest man; a monk doesn't lie."

What nonsense is this? I'm just spouting lies too. I lightly slapped my mouth, then crawled back into the dark hole behind the bed and started climbing upwards. Where the flashlight shone, the hole walls were narrow, all white marble, and it was straight up and down, slippery to the touch.

Although it was only a dozen meters high, I panted heavily and climbed it several times, but each time I fell down halfway. To make matters worse, the hidden door under my feet had closed at some point. I stomped on it several times, but it wouldn't open. Turning back was no longer an option.

Could I really be trapped in this rat hole? I gritted my teeth, took off my shoes, and used both elbows, knees, and feet to push myself up step by step. For a full half hour, just when I was drenched in sweat, trembling, and about to give up, my right hand finally touched the top of the hole.

I gritted my teeth again and tried to inch my way up another foot. My head was touching the top of the hole. Fortunately, it was just a thin marble slab. I gasped for breath, pushed the slab aside, grabbed the edge of the hole with both hands, and with my last bit of strength, I climbed out of the straight hole.

Sitting on the cave ceiling, I gasped for breath for a long time before taking a step. My legs, which were trembling as if they didn't belong to me, snapped shut on the marble slab and collapsed to the ground, almost fainting from exhaustion.

When I finally managed to get up and walk, before I could even straighten my back, my head slammed into a stone slab. I covered my head, turned on my signal flashlight, and saw that I was in a stone box about five feet square.

I groped around but couldn't find the hidden door. In my panic, I pressed a stone button in the corner of the stone box. Suddenly, the box spun around and threw me to the bottom. I don't know how many times it spun, but I saw sparks and bumped into walls everywhere. I had several big bumps on my head and almost passed out.

When the stone box stopped spinning, I sat up, bruised and swollen, vowing to lift the stone slab beneath me and slide down into the cave. Even if I died inside, I would rather be toyed to death like this.

But when I reached under myself, I couldn't find the cave slab anymore. I gaped in astonishment, picked up the flashlight I'd dropped, and searched carefully, but still couldn't find it. I collapsed to the ground.

Finally realizing what was happening, I shone my flashlight on the stone box and saw that it was about three feet wide and seven feet long—exactly the size of a standard stone coffin. I could no longer contain my fear and frantically kicked and pounded on the stone walls, screaming at the top of my lungs…

Volume 3, Yin Yang Five Elements Array, Chapter 65: I Want to Kill Robert

I screamed until my voice was hoarse, but no one came to my rescue. It seemed I couldn't believe in miracles. The air inside the stone box was getting thinner and thinner. I kicked the stone walls helplessly, and could no longer control myself as I drifted off to sleep.

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