After all, the cause and effect in this world are impermanent and cannot be judged.
"And then?" Wen Yuhan asked, "What else did he say to you afterward?"
Pei Shaocheng paused for a moment, then tightened his grip on Wen Yuhan, bringing him closer to his chest, before speaking in a deep voice: "Han Shu will be returning to China next month. He has rewritten that play and wants to revive it as the first shot in his comeback."
Wen Yuhan gripped the corner of the blanket tightly, his eyes brightening and darkening. After sorting everything out, he chuckled softly, "No wonder." No wonder Han Shu wanted to get rid of him as soon as possible this time. Compared to guarding against him and suppressing his voice, being unable to speak was much more reassuring.
Pei Shaocheng cupped Wen Yuhan's face in his hands, making him look into his eyes: "Listen to me, Xiaohan, in my opinion, this is precisely your best chance to turn things around and prove yourself. No one in the world understands Andrew better than you; you are the one who created him... Rewrite this play and premiere it at the same time as Han Shu's play, so that everyone will understand that Andrew belongs to you!"
Wen Yuhan stared silently at Pei Shaocheng, lost in thought. This silence made Pei Shaocheng inexplicably uneasy, and he immediately added earnestly, "I know a month is a tight schedule, but with me by your side, we can discuss the character and rehearse together. I've already asked Emily to cancel my schedule for the next two months. We'll create an even better work than before..."
"Did you ask for my opinion?" Wen Yuhan suddenly interrupted, quietly staring at Pei Shaocheng with a smile. "I can't afford to compensate Mr. Pei for the losses caused by such a rash decision to turn down the job."
Pei Shaocheng was stunned, staring at Wen Yuhan in bewilderment.
Wen Yuhan avoided Pei Shaocheng's embrace, his gaze fixed on a corner of the ward, his face devoid of emotion. "I remember telling you before, I'm tired. I don't plan to have anything to do with film or theater again in this lifetime... That 'theater fanatic' is dead. The Wen Yuhan left behind is just an ordinary person who wants to make a living and live a simple life. What do those artistic pursuits and such have to do with me?" He gave a bitter laugh. "As for Han Shu... I only ask that he let me go. I admit I'm afraid of him. I've lost. I won't interfere with his plans, and I hope he can just treat me like a dirty, annoying fly and chase me away."
"Wen Yuhan, you!"
"And you, Pei Shaocheng," Wen Yuhan said casually, "Don't mention Andrew or Pan to me again. Let them be whoever they want. In short, it's none of my business."
"Wen Yuhan!!"
Pei Shaocheng's eyes were red-rimmed. He grabbed Wen Yuhan's hand and pressed it tightly against his chest, asking in a hoarse voice, word by word:
"You really... don't want it anymore...?"
...
Chapter 75
Wen Yuhan let Pei Shaocheng hold his hand, his expression hidden in the daylight, his eyes filled with a desolate emptiness born of having seen through everything. Finally, a faint, serene smile curved his lips as he said, "I was once willing to give everything for these things, and shamelessly told myself and the whole world that I, Wen Yuhan, was born for these things. But later, because of these things, I couldn't see my grandmother one last time, I was betrayed and abandoned by someone who was like a teacher and a father to me, I bore the most unbearable infamy a creator could bear, my self-esteem was trampled underfoot, I was like an insect stuck in a spider's web, monitored and threatened by a predator, not knowing when I would become their meal..."
Pei Shaocheng's heart trembled violently with every word Wen Yuhan uttered, bleeding profusely. The pain forced him to bend over so that he could breathe more easily.
In contrast, Wen Yuhan remained calm and composed throughout, as if she were an outsider telling someone else's story.
“Even so, I still didn’t want to give up. For art, for Andrew… for you.” Wen Yuhan said with a self-deprecating smile, “So I still chose to go back and face it, even if it meant a different identity, even if I was just a ghostwriter for the rest of my life, even if I had to let all the resentment and truth rot inside me. Even if you treated me like that… But what happened afterward?”
“You did this to protect me,” Pei Shaocheng said in a hoarse voice.
“Until I actually died once, many problems suddenly became easy to solve. In the first half of my life, I was too obsessed with things, and the more I wanted to grasp something, the less I could hold onto it. Actually, thinking about it now, as long as I can let go of these things, I will become more relaxed and at ease. And I am the kind of person who originally liked relaxation and ease the most.”
"You can't let go! How could you, Wen Yuhan, be content with mediocrity?" Pei Shaocheng interrupted loudly, then his voice rose with a sense of grievance, and he stubbornly said, his voice choked with sobs, "I... I won't allow you to let go..."
You are not allowed to let go of those things that once shone like light in your eyes, nor are you allowed to let go of the self that once loved me so deeply.
“Pei Shaocheng, actually I don’t blame you anymore,” Wen Yuhan said softly. “After all, what wrong did you do by keeping me in the dark all this time… In the end, it’s really too pretentious for us to torment each other for so long and always act like we can’t bear to part. If the story were written like this, people would call it melodramatic. We are both innocent and deserve it. It would be extremely foolish to continue this entanglement.”
"I'm going to keep entangled with you like this!" Pei Shaocheng pulled Wen Yuhan into his arms, but hesitated to press too close for fear of touching his wounds. His voice trembled as he said, "I only want you, Xiaohan, I only want you... Please give me another chance, give me another chance to prove myself. I won't force you anymore. You can do whatever you want, as long as you don't send me away!"
Seeing Wen Yuhan remain silent, Pei Shaocheng's tears slid down his cheeks to his chin: "I don't believe you can really let me go... You only chose to come back after leaving because you couldn't bear to part with me, even though I, even though I treated you like that, you still..." Pei Shaocheng murmured repeatedly, not so much reminding Wen Yuhan, but also constantly implying to himself.
Wen Yuhan closed his eyes, feeling as if all the strength he had finally managed to regain had vanished. He said weakly, "I'm tired."
Fearing that Wen Yuhan's emotional turmoil would further affect the recovery of her wounds, Pei Shaocheng suppressed the myriad emotions churning within him, cleared his dry throat, and nodded: "I'll go back and cook for you, soon, wait for me." After saying this, he tightened his grip on Wen Yuhan's hand before reluctantly walking out of the ward.
Wen Yuhan watched the other person's tall figure leave, letting out a long sigh in the fading light. Then, he lifted the pillow and pulled a pack of cigarettes from under the sheet. Clutching his injured abdomen, he shakily walked towards the hospital rooftop…
⚹
The end of the month has arrived in the blink of an eye. The cold winds of late winter can no longer stop the momentum of early spring, and all things revive, with birds flying and grass growing.
During this period, Wen Yuhan has been recuperating in the hospital. Apart from occasionally scrolling through some mindless videos on her phone or secretly going to the rooftop to smoke behind Pei Shaocheng and Xiao Yang's backs, she mostly sits there in silence, lost in thought.
He used the manuscript paper on the table to line his food and water cup, and the pen next to him had only been used a few times, just to jot down takeout phone numbers or something. Like most people, he no longer wanted to use those most traditional writing mediums.
"What is Teacher Wen looking at?" Xiao Yang used a fruit knife to peel and cut the apple into small pieces, placing them in a bowl and inserting toothpicks. He usually saw Pei Shaocheng doing this and felt resentful, so he treated Wen Yuhan with even more care and consideration.
Wen Yuhan used a toothpick to pick up a piece of apple and put it in her mouth to chew: "Hmm... I'm watching a blogger live stream eating Indian street food."
"Oh, I've seen that too!" Xiao Yang said, frowning. "It seems that Indians use their left hand to go to the toilet and their right hand to eat... Do you think they use their hands to scoop food from hot pot?"
"Hmm..." Wen Yuhan rested his chin on his thumb, pretending to think. "In that case, would you use your left hand or your right hand to scoop it up? After all, it's inconvenient to eat if your right hand is burned."
Xiao Yang was amused by Wen Yuhan's sly look: "Is the teacher bad or is the teacher bad?"
Wen Yuhan also smiled slightly, sat up from the bed, and put her arm around Xiao Yang's shoulder.
"Are you going to smoke again?"
Wen Yuhan shook his cigarette pack with his back to him and said in a drawn-out tone, "Guess whether I hold the cigarette with my left hand or my right hand... Ouch!" As soon as he finished speaking, he bumped into a solid and broad chest.
Wen Yuhan's eyes flickered for a moment, then returned to calm: "You've come."
“Come and switch shifts with Xiao Yang.” Pei Shaocheng looked at Wen Yuhan with an unyielding tenderness in his eyes.
Such a gaze made Wen Yuhan feel somewhat uncomfortable, so she turned her head to the side.
“Mr. Pei, you don’t really need to go to the hospital every day.” Xiao Yang was still annoyed with Pei Shaocheng. Her tone was polite but cold. “I’m not busy these days, and my teacher’s health has improved a lot. I think you should hurry up and go back to Yancheng.”
Pei Shaocheng narrowed his eyes slightly as he looked at Xiao Yang, who instinctively took a small step back.
No matter how many times she tried to bolster her courage, Xiao Yang was still afraid of Pei Shaocheng's cheetah-like gaze. This was probably due to an animal instinct.
“Xiao Yang is right.” Wen Yuhan played with the cigarette case, letting it move nimbly between her fingers, and looked up to say, “I just saw a message, ‘Sinking Lake’ is going to be performed the day after tomorrow, right? I remember you promised him you would be there.”
"I came to talk to you about this. I'm leaving this afternoon and will be back tonight after I'm done," Pei Shaocheng said softly, meeting Wen Yuhan's gaze.
"There's no need to rush. You can't stay in Wancheng forever. Just go back and start working this time."
Pei Shaocheng snatched the cigarette pack from Wen Yuhan's hand: "No..." He paused after seeing Wen Yuhan's cold expression, and then sighed helplessly, "Just one, I'll go with you."
In principle, patients are not allowed on the hospital rooftop, but Wen Yuhan, with her silver tongue, could both prick and coax people. During her hospitalization, she naturally became friends with the doctors, nurses, cleaners, and security guards, and managed to get a key from the gatekeeper. The gatekeeper trusted Wen Yuhan's character and knew that he wouldn't deliberately cause trouble for him, so after following her a few times, he allowed Wen Yuhan to come and go freely.
The spring air carries a drowsy warmth, and soon it will be the season when willow catkins fill the city.
Wen Yuhan tilted his head, lit a lighter, took a drag of his cigarette, and leaned against the rooftop railing. Pei Shaocheng silently watched the slender figure from behind. He remembered that on the day they reunited, Wen Yuhan looked just like this. They were only a few steps apart, but Pei Shaocheng still felt an immense distance between them. Even though he tried time and again to cross that distance, whenever he saw those calm and distant eyes, getting closer felt like an age-old, unsolvable puzzle.
"I heard that tickets for 'Sinking Lake' sold out instantly. Even a seat on the second floor near the back can fetch nearly five figures?" Wen Yuhan looked into the distance, her tone unhurried.
"Hmm." Pei Shaocheng lit a cigarette and walked towards Wen Yuhan, standing next to him.
Wen Yuhan chuckled, puffing on his cigarette: "It's a bit unusual to suddenly have so many people who like theater."
"The excitement is more interesting than the show."
“Heh.” Wen Yuhan nodded. “Indeed, a genius who just rose to prominence in the industry and then fell from grace, and a protagonist kidnapper being escorted by the police—either of these gimmicks is more exciting than ‘Sinking Lake’ itself.”
“He brought this upon himself,” Pei Shaocheng said coldly.
Wen Yuhan fell silent, her slender fingertips tracing circles on the cold railing.
"Do you think Yi Li truly likes theater?" he asked softly. "Or is it just that he loves you because he loves you, and that's why he loves theater?"
Pei Shaocheng's Adam's apple bobbed. He didn't want to discuss this person with Wen Yuhan any further. In his eyes, Yi Li was the culprit who almost caused Wen Yuhan's death; who cared about analyzing whether he was passionate about drama or not?
"Or perhaps in his heart, you and the stage were one. Because of the stage, he fell in love with you. And because of you, he chose the stage." Wen Yuhan stubbed out his cigarette and smiled. "So, you really are the worthy Pan, the god of shepherds."
“I will only be your Pan.” Pei Shaocheng took Wen Yuhan’s hand, nodded and kissed his fingertips tenderly. “You are also only my water sprite.”
Wen Yuhan quietly watched Pei Shaocheng, seeing him gaze at her with devout eyes. His tall figure, backed by the spring sunshine, truly resembled a towering deity.
"In any case, I still hope his performance goes well," Wen Yuhan said calmly.
After all, this is likely to be Yi Li's last stage in his life.
...
A note from the author:
Thank you so much for your support! I will continue to work hard!
Chapter 76
On the day of the premiere of "Sinking Lake", the Yancheng Grand Theater was packed with people early in the morning, and all the roads were blocked.
The numerous conversations they exchanged mostly revolved around gossip about the "star" named Yi Li, with very little mention of the play itself.
"How could someone so good-looking be a kidnapper?!"
"I really can't figure it out, who exactly did he kidnap?"
"I don't know, it seems like the news has been blocked, they're being very secretive, maybe it's some big shot."
"Hey, I heard from my best friend that her friend's friend is a producer in the industry. Apparently, the person who was kidnapped by Yi Li was a man, and he had that kind of relationship with him!"
"What relationship?!"
"Oh, that's the kind of relationship we have!"
"Damn, I knew it! The moment I saw this kid, I knew he was the one! Do you think he's the top or the bottom?"
"He must be the bottom, he's so good-looking."
Do you think he's had plastic surgery or not?
"No, it looks quite natural."
"I think she's had plastic surgery, at least her nose has been done; it looks transparent in the sunlight."
"Do you think it's possible that he wasn't actually kidnapping at all?"
"How should I say it? How should I say it?"
"Could it be S&M?"
"No way... S&M would get arrested?"
"That's true, hehe!"
...
In the backstage dressing room, a delicate, fair hand gently picked up a powder puff. Amidst the rising fine white powder, a serene calm shone in those beautiful eyes, devoid of sorrow or joy.
Two men sat on either side of him. The younger one was staring intently at the boy in the mirror, while the older one was scrolling through his phone listlessly.
Occasionally, actors or staff members would pass by and choose to quietly avoid the three of them, but whispers and gossip always circulated about them.
"Sister Wang, those two...are they police officers?"