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Kapitel 5

"It sounds really good!" "How do I get through one night without you? If I had to live without you, what kind of life would that be? Oh, I need you in my arms, need you to hold me. You're my world, my heart, my soul. If you ever leave, baby, you would take away everything good in my life. And tell me now, how do I live without you? I want to know how do I breathe without you? If you ever go, how do I ever, ever survive?" "Is it good?" I sang from the deepest part of my heart. "It's good! But my cousin doesn't understand it. Who taught you?" "When I was little, a foreign barbarian taught me. He saw I had a pleasing appearance and taught me to sing it." There are also some ethnic minorities in Bianjing City, and they...

I couldn't understand what he was saying, so I just let him misunderstand. "Don't go to Grandma's!" He hugged my waist and rested his chin on my head. Today, someone from the Liu family came, saying that the old lady missed me and wanted me to stay with her for a while. I agreed immediately; my current situation is too...

How awkward! This is practically an ancient version of my boyfriend getting married and the bride not being me! Grandma's suggestion is just giving me a chance to avoid this situation!

So, taking the easy way out, he immediately agreed to return first thing tomorrow morning. "You're letting me go, or I'll resent you! Auntie agreed, and you've also considered my feelings; staying at home would only be a burden to Auntie."

She has so much to do, she's lost weight, and besides, I can't bear to see you marry someone else! Isn't this tearing my heart out?! Think about it.

I felt so wronged by my situation, my voice choked with emotion. Since that day, no matter how busy he was, he would make time to see me every day, but we talked much less, often falling silent.

He would play the flute for me every time, and the one he played most often was "Kangxi," which almost brought tears to my eyes every time I listened.

"Cousin, I want to ask you for something!" I straightened up slightly and looked up into his eyes.

"Anything my cousin has!" His beautiful phoenix eyes looked back at me firmly. "He definitely has it!" I smiled charmingly at him. I pulled his head down, gently covered his eyes with my hands, and slowly kissed his lips. His lips were soft and warm, his tongue...

I licked along the shape of his lips, and felt his body tremble slightly. His hands tightened around my waist. I knew this was definitely...

His first kiss—that's what I wanted. Even if I couldn't have him, his first kiss had to be mine. Now I have it, and I feel...

A small surge of satisfaction and pride welled up within me, and I sucked on his lips even harder. Suddenly, I felt a tightness on the back of my head; he pressed one hand against my head and the other...

He wrapped his arms around my waist, his strength radiating from his body, pulling me closer to his and turning the tables on me, then kissing my lips again.

I bit him again. "Ouch!" I cried out, but before I could finish, his tongue slipped into my mouth and intertwined with mine, lingering there for a long time.

As I receded, just when I felt like I was suffocating, he finally let go of me. We were both panting. It turned out that Cheng Zhuri also belonged to...

I'm the type who seems cold on the outside but warm on the inside. I usually appear quite aloof, but deep down I have a burning passion, and I'm certain that this passion will only reside within me.

I was burning with passion, leaning against his chest to catch my breath, savoring our first kiss. After a while, I heard his voice, now back to normal, above me, "Come back soon, don't keep me waiting too long!" I'd barely arrived at the Liu family home, hadn't even had a sip of tea, when my grandmother pulled me into the bedroom and asked, "Xiaoxiao, every time you come, Ri'er brings you."

"Why is it Butler Qi this time?" "My cousin was supposed to see me off, but I wouldn't let him!" He was telling the truth. "Did you have a falling out?" "No, no, the Rong family's young lady is getting married, and Zhuqin is getting married too. There are so many things to worry about, so I asked Uncle Qi to see me off." He was truly...

It's so annoying. I came here hoping for a quiet change of scenery, but the old folks really care about me, so I have to patiently answer all their questions.

"Now everyone in Bianjing is saying that Miss Rong fell in love with Ri'er at first sight at the Chrysanthemum Festival and is determined to marry him, which has enraged Lord Rong."

Ting said that countless wealthy young men in Bianjing were waiting for her to choose, and that no daughter of an official or scholar would marry a merchant. But Miss Rong refused no matter what.

She even declared that she would either marry Ri'er or shave her head and become a nun. She'd been arguing with her family for almost a year, and she was getting on in years.

Lord Rong had no choice but to agree. "When we were touring Bao Gong Lake, Lord Rong summoned Cheng's three brothers for questioning. At the time, we were a little scared and worried..."

"Something must have happened. Now that I think about it, he probably wanted to see his cousin in person!" After meeting Cheng Zhuri, I found him to be handsome and learned.

Well, they were considered the cream of the crop among merchant families, and the Cheng family was one of the wealthiest and most prominent families in Bianjing (Kaifeng).

He only nodded in agreement because he knew that if the Cheng family were poor, Miss Rong would probably cry herself to death, but her father still wouldn't agree.

"A few days ago, I specifically asked your uncle to come over. He told us everything. I'm so sorry you had to go through all this. Grandma knows how you feel."

It must be tough, so I asked you to come back and stay for a while, just to clear your head! It's a real shame to make you wait two years, given your talent.

The flower is beautiful, but you can't blame your uncle and his family. The Rong family is powerful and influential. If you take a concubine right after getting married, you can't explain it to them.

Although I am old and my eyesight is failing, my heart is as clear as a mirror. Ri'er's feelings for you are self-evident; anyone with discerning eyes knows this.

"I can only feel at ease entrusting you to him, after all, it's your destiny..." "Grandma, I understand, I don't blame anyone. But I just got back, I haven't even had a sip of tea yet, I'm hungry. Grandma and I..."

Grandma's staying for quite a while, so we'll have plenty of time to chat! "That damned fate is at it again, it's like a curse I can't escape no matter where I go."

If she wouldn't open it, she had to resort to coaxing and changing the subject. "Look, I'm not so clueless anymore, am I? Come on, tea and snacks are all ready, including your favorite peanut cake and almond tea!" Grandma said.

She took my hand and led me outside. "Xiaoxiao, the room I chose is the quietest. It's right next to the garden, and it was all set up early."

"I guarantee you'll like it. Take a good rest first; I've prepared lots of delicious food for you tonight."

"Thank you, Grandma!" Actually, I don't like peanut cake at all. I only said it out of politeness since it was our first meeting, saying that Grandma's peanut cake was especially good.

"The fragrance is nice. It's fine if I come occasionally, but please don't prepare it for me every day." "Pearl, first take Xiaohe to the east wing with Miss Biao's things, then see if we need anything else, and make sure everything is prepared carefully for me."

alright. ” <bgsound src=/Music/Country/Trisha%20Yearwood%20-%20How%20Do%20I%20Live.mp3>

Version 1: Falling in love is easy, staying together is hard. Chapter 22: Jealousy

"Cousin, you're such a talented painter! How about painting a portrait? Make one for your wife!" I enthusiastically suggested. Looking at the two butterflies fluttering among the flowers in Liu Yu's painting, they were so lifelike. How could he paint them so vividly? The butterflies were even in constant motion. I sincerely admire people with real talent. I've also studied painting, but my subjects have always been still things.

My cousin's wife laughed, "Don't tease me, cousin. How could someone as plain as me be worthy of a painting?" "I mean it," she replied, "you're too modest. You're quite a beautiful woman. A woman's youth is fleeting; you should capture your most beautiful moments while you're young. When you're old, you can reminisce about your youthful beauty, and you can show your children what their parents looked like when they were young. Isn't that wonderful!" In this era without cameras, I've finally met a skilled painter, so of course I have to seize the opportunity. Why didn't I think of having Cheng Zhuri paint one for me? Ah, I'm thinking of him again! I've been at the Liu family's house for almost half a month now. Every day I write, paint, and do needlework. Life seems quite pleasant and happy. Cheng came to see me once a day, but we didn't meet. That day, I was accompanying a group of women from the Liu family to the temple to burn incense and make wishes. Now my schedule is packed every day. In the morning, I either chat with my grandmother or do needlework with my cousin's wife. Occasionally, when I'm in the mood, I'll drag my cousin's wife along to cook a few dishes. In the afternoon, I paint or admire the flowers in the garden with my cousin and the others. Then I spend time with Xing'er, writing and playing games. My cousin's youngest son is not yet two years old. His little body is as soft as cotton candy, and he smells like milk. I play with him like a toy every day. His eldest son, Xing'er, is only five years old, but he has already started reading, painting, and learning the piano. I remember in my past life, people said that Chinese children had heavy academic burdens and no happy childhood. It turns out this is a long-standing tradition of the Chinese nation. It turns out that children in ancient times didn't have it easy either! So I thought of many games suitable for children to play with Xing'er and make him happy. Children are easy to win over, and after a few days he has become my little shadow, following me around every day, calling me "Auntie" in his sweet, childish voice. Looking into his pure eyes and angelic smile makes me temporarily forget all my troubles. It's more accurate to say that I want to find some joy in him than to say that I'm keeping him company. The days pass easily, but at night, when I'm all alone, a deep emptiness gnaws at me. I can't sleep through the long nights. I miss Cheng Zhu Ri. I really, really miss him. We used to meet every night, but now I'm just staring blankly at the jade pendant he gave me. But I'm also afraid that if I see him, he will belong to someone else, and the more I think about it, the more painful it becomes. "Cousin, cousin, why are you spacing out again!" I snapped out of my reverie and saw my cousin's wife's face right in front of me. "No, no, I was just thinking that it's rare to get along so well with my cousin-in-law, and I wanted to ask you to paint a picture for us as a memento!" The Liu family understood that she was often moved by familiar sights, but they were just pretending not to know. Liu Yu looked at the sky, "But it's getting late today, so we can only paint tomorrow!" "Okay, okay, tomorrow it is. We'll meet here after lunch tomorrow. Thank you for your help, cousin."

"I'd be happy to help!" "Sister-in-law, let's get our faces done together tonight, and then we can dress up properly tomorrow. You'll look even better with makeup on tomorrow!"

My cousin's wife blushed a little, "No matter how beautiful you are, you can't be as beautiful as Xiaoxiao!" I said to her seriously, "No, my cousin's wife is beautiful, but her beauty is different from Xiaoxiao's. It's a mature and intellectual beauty! It's because of people's different aesthetic concepts that the world becomes so colorful. No matter how beautiful Xiaoxiao is, if all the women in the world looked like me, how boring it would be!" "Both of you are beauties. Now, I'd like to trouble you, Shulan, to brew me another pot of hot tea!" my cousin joked.

My cousin's wife, Shulan, is a woman whose name perfectly reflects her character. She's a truly virtuous woman, equally adept in the living room and the kitchen, with an elegant demeanor and a gentle, refined air. She always speaks and acts with composure and efficiency, handling matters with remarkable order and efficiency. It was the first time I realized that a woman's beauty can radiate from within, making one overlook her outward appearance. I deliberately feigned displeasure, asking, "Why didn't you call your wife, cousin? Where's Xiaolü?" Xiaolü is my cousin's maid, about the same age as Xiaohe. The two get along very well, often discussing embroidery together. I also quite like Xiaolü, because she reminds me of myself in a past life—efficient and quick-witted. Books say that people who speak quickly are usually quick-witted and intelligent. Occasionally, when I have free time in the evenings, I even get them both together for beauty and body shaping exercises. Liu Yu and her cousin-in-law exchanged a smile. "You don't know this, brewing tea is a delicate art. The type of tea, the water temperature, and the amount of tea leaves all matter. Your cousin-in-law's family is in the tea business, so she's been exposed to it since childhood and is an excellent tea brewer. Ever since she married into the family, the tea brewed by the servants has been unpalatable to me. I guess I've been spoiled by her!" "Xiao Lü was just pulling Xiao He aside to look at the new embroidery patterns. I saw you looking at the paintings so intently, so I granted your request without telling you." Her cousin-in-law picked up the teapot. "Please have a seat, I'll be there in a bit." "Thank you for your trouble, Madam!" Liu Yu smiled gently at her cousin-in-law, looking at them with envy. This must be what they call a harmonious and respectful marriage!

Now only Liu Yu and I are left in the garden, but I'm not nervous at all. Having learned from my experience with the bearded man last time, I've re-evaluated my approach to people-watching. Besides, after spending time together, I've found Liu Yu to be a truly good person—elegant, well-mannered, skilled in music, chess, poetry, and painting, and very talkative. What I admire most is that he only married my cousin's wife and hasn't taken any concubines. Such a good man is hard to find here. "I've often heard my father mention that my eldest aunt was a famous talented woman in Bianjing. Would I have the honor of witnessing my cousin's talent?" Ah, that's the downside of ancient times. Women are constantly expected to showcase their talents. If you don't know music, chess, calligraphy, or painting, regardless of your social standing or beauty, your worth is significantly reduced. After thinking for a moment, I said to him, "How about I sing a song for you, cousin?" Singing is my best skill. "With pleasure!" I composed myself and started singing, of course, my favorite song, "Blue and White Porcelain." Before I was even halfway through, I saw Cheng Zhuri standing under a tree, looking at me. I felt a surge of excitement and ran to him. Hmm, he looked thinner and a bit haggard, with faint shadows under his eyes. He hadn't slept well last night, just like me. He must have been missing me. I hope he wasn't exhausted from preparing for the wedding!

"Why are you here!" "I was afraid someone would forget me!" He whispered in my ear. "You're being cheeky!" But I liked hearing it. "Cousin, what brings you here?" Liu Yu stood up and called to Cheng Zhuri. "Cousin, are you upset that I came uninvited?" Cheng Zhuri pulled me to sit down opposite Liu Yu. Ah, why is he holding my hand in front of strangers! My face flushed red. Liu Yu glanced at Cheng Zhuri's hand and laughed, "Not at all, not at all. I was just listening to Xiaoxiao sing a song. Her voice is so beautiful. Although I haven't heard the tune before, it has a unique charm coming from her, like pearls falling onto a jade plate!" It was similar to Cheng Zhuri's evaluation, but you don't have to flatter me like that, it's too much! "Yes, I like it very much too. This poem was specially written for me by Xiaoxiao!" Cheng Zhuri's voice was melodious, and his expression was one of happiness and sweetness. Oh, how did it become a letter I wrote to him? Seeing Liu Yu's smile, I paused. "So it was Xiao Xiao who wrote it. My cousin is so lucky!"

Cheng Zhuri nodded, "Yes, I feel very fortunate to have such a beautiful woman!" Just then, his cousin's wife brought in tea. "What are you talking about? I heard you were here, so I brought some tea and snacks! Xiao Lü, Xiao He, quickly set out the tea and snacks!" She even poured a cup of tea for each of us. The timing was perfect, but the atmosphere was a little strange! "Xiao Xiao wrote a poem for me and even set it to music. My cousin said I'm a lucky man, and I think he's also a lucky man to have such a wonderful woman like my cousin's wife!" Cheng Zhuri picked up his teacup, smelled it, and took a sip. "My cousin's wife truly makes excellent tea!"

“My cousin-in-law grew up in a family steeped in tea culture; this skill was honed from a young age!” I hadn’t paid attention before, but now I’m going to savor this tea to see just how good it is. My cousin-in-law said, “I heard that my aunt was a famous talented woman in Bianjing (Kaifeng) at the time, and my cousin inherited her skills; I suppose she’s quite good at writing poetry!”

"Yes." Cheng Zhuri looked at me with tender affection as he spoke softly, "Not only are the lyrics beautiful, but the embroidery is also exquisite. The love token she embroidered for me is meticulously crafted, with elegant colors. Every stitch reflects a young woman's heart, and the pattern is unlike anything I've ever seen before. She says it's unique to me! To have such deep affection from her, Heaven has truly been kind to me!" "Cough, cough..." A love token! I managed to hold back from spitting out my tea, but I still choked. "Look at you, no one's going to take it from you, slow down." Cheng Zhuri reached out and patted my back. "It's alright, it's alright, my cousin's tea is so fragrant, I drank it too fast!" But it really felt like he was trying too hard to hide something. To be honest, I quite liked his direct, verbal way of expressing his feelings. I knew Cheng Zhuri's feelings for me very well, but as a modern person with a modern soul, he hadn't said "I love you" to me, which left me somewhat unsatisfied. But this wasn't the right occasion, was it? This was the first time I'd seen Cheng Zhuri speak so much in front of strangers, and with such surprising words! Where has his usual rational, calm, and taciturn demeanor as a successful successor gone?

"Hearing you say that, cousin, I really want to see it. I wonder if I could borrow it for a look?" Cheng Zhuri replied apologetically, "I shouldn't refuse you, cousin-in-law, but this is the first gift Xiaoxiao gave me, and it's also a token of our love. It's incredibly precious. I wear it close to my body every day, and I'm afraid it will wear out, so I sewed it into a brocade pouch. I can't take it out. Please forgive me, cousin-in-law!" Today, Cheng Zhuri was truly astonishing. His cheesy words rivaled those in Qiong Yao's novels, like a large male feline spreading its scent across its territory, declaring its dominance, and I was the object of his declaration. Could he be misunderstanding something between me and Liu Yu? Although I've let my guard down around Liu Yu, I still know my limits. I'm still an unmarried girl; I can't and shouldn't be alone with him. Today was the exception. To me, he and Cheng Zhuri are completely different. I was afraid Liu Yu would be unhappy, so I observed him carefully. He listened attentively to Cheng Zhuri's pleas, his expression as kind as ever, without saying much. Cheng Zhuri was overthinking things this time. My cousin's wife exclaimed with emotion, "Cousin, you're such a loving person!" "I'm sorry to Xiaoxiao, but the burden of the Cheng family is a responsibility I can't shirk. But I will spend my whole life making it up to Xiaoxiao! I will never let her down in this life!" he replied to my cousin's wife, his eyes fixed on me. My heart was filled with mixed feelings. The person he loved was me. He had just promised to consummate our marriage, but in the blink of an eye, he had to marry someone else.