Pang Yi hesitated for a moment, then answered, "He's been sent to the intensive care unit. If he can make it through tonight, he should be fine."
Yu Lele smiled: "That's good."
She glanced at the glucose bag, which was still a third full, and reached out to pull out the needle. Xu Chen suddenly realized what was happening, reached out to stop her, and looked at her with a hint of anger: "Don't be silly."
“I need to go see my students,” she said.
"I'll go with you to see the doctor after your IV drip is finished." The imperative sentence was phrased with an unquestionable tone.
“I’m fine,” she insisted, smiling at him. “Really, I’m not lying to you.”
“No.” He was unusually stubborn.
She looked at his face and finally gave up. She waved her hand, called Pang Yi to her side, and carefully instructed him: "Don't tell the class about my fainting. You go back to class as soon as possible. I'll stay with you in the ICU after the IV drip is finished. There are two composition classes this afternoon. The compositions from last time have already been graded and are on my desk. Take them to the class and distribute them this afternoon. The new composition topics and requirements are written in my lesson plan book. Assign them to the students, and put them back on my desk after class."
She saw Pang Yi nod and smiled, "Thank you, Pang Yi."
Pang Yi accepted the order and left. As noon approached, the number of patients receiving IV drips in the observation room gradually decreased until only the two of them remained, sitting face to face in silence.
Actually, we both had a lot to say, but neither of us knew what to say.
He stood up, walked to the window, and gently pulled down the blinds to block the glaring midday sun. Her gaze followed him, and she seemed to only then realize how handsome he looked in his white doctor's coat.
He has always been good-looking.
In that instant, it felt as if time had turned back.
It seems like it was still in the small classroom of the Experimental Middle School. The girl glared defiantly at the boy in front of her. His foot stepped on her stool, leaving a dirty footprint. She then flung his notebook onto the wet floor.
It seems like it was still in the forest park south of the city, they lay side by side on the lush green grass, their arms as pillows, gazing at the sky. The weather was clear and cloudless that day. A gentle breeze blew by; it was the best weather I had ever seen in my life.
It seems like it was behind the school building again, that she broke down in tears, and he was at a loss for what to do. At that time, she hadn't fallen in love with him yet, and he was just a best friend with whom she could lean on a shoulder to cry.
It seems like it was still on that cold winter mountaintop, she had climbed up breathlessly, and the moment she saw him, she almost burst into tears. In that instant, all hatred vanished from her mind; she just wanted him to be well. As long as he was well, she would give up everything she cherished most in the world…
She finally realized that the reason she had waited so long, and was still waiting, was simply because she still harbored illusions.
Because I always felt that one day, he would stand beside me, and even without saying a word, he would make me feel warm.
On the day Meng Xiaoyu was finally out of danger, Yu Lele was also told that her job application was canceled.
Li Jing's expression was one of utter anguish: "Yu Lele, how could you be so careless? Why didn't you tell the school about something so serious?"
Yu Lele looked at Li Jing with a calm expression, remaining silent.
Li Jing sighed deeply, reached out and grabbed Yu Lele's hand, but for a moment she didn't know what to say.
She knew that Yu Lele probably already knew everything she was about to say.
This mistake isn't a huge one, but it's not insignificant either. On a larger scale, it reflects a lack of responsibility; on a smaller scale, it's simply a lack of experience. The real mistake lies in the fact that Yu Lele herself is still a student; she's used to considering things from the students' perspective, neglecting the fact that she is now a teacher.
A teacher's perspective can never be the same as a student's perspective.
Li Jing couldn't remember when she first understood this, but she believed that from this day forward, Yu Lele must have kept this principle in mind.
This price is far too heavy.
This was no small matter—a devastating blow to Yu Lele's teaching career, and its effects quickly spread throughout the Chinese Department of the Teachers' College. Ren Yuan was furious, but powerless to do anything about it.
An irreversible ending can only be accepted. Yu Lele gave a bitter smile amidst the pity in her classmates' eyes once again.
Yu Lele, once the most outstanding female student in the history of the Chinese Department of the Teachers' College, suddenly became the most tragic female protagonist in the department's history. Almost naturally, the distance between them and their classmates gradually dissipated with these events. After all, when Yu Lele's life became less smooth, and her assertive and sharp edges began to soften, she became much more ordinary and endearing in everyone's eyes.
So, throughout June, everyone was busy saying goodbye and reminiscing about warm memories and the past. What came to mind were the sweet and comforting days of their student life. It was only then that many people, including Yu Lele, truly understood what the word "classmate" meant—it was a ticket that would never expire, a ticket that allowed them to find each other anytime, anywhere.
Some people have already begun signing employment agreements with various middle schools. Xu Yin got her wish and went to work at the TV station. Lian Haiping also passed the political review smoothly and entered the physical examination stage. Only Yu Lele remained indifferent, continuing her life as an "unemployed youth."
Ren Yuan couldn't stand it anymore and contacted various schools every day, trying to recommend jobs for Yu Lele. However, most schools had already signed agreements with interns, so Yu Lele's sudden emergence was unlikely to be smooth sailing.
Uncle Yu was also a little anxious and asked Yu Lele, "I'm somewhat acquainted with the heads of a few schools, should we...?"
"No." Before the words were even finished, Yu Lele had already covered Uncle Yu's mouth.
“Lele, you can’t act impulsively,” Mom said, frowning slightly. “Actually, we all know that this was just an accident. If you weren’t a student teacher, at most a warning or a reprimand in a meeting would have been enough. But you are a student teacher, so small things can be treated as big things. This doesn’t prove anything. You can’t give up because of this. Isn’t being a teacher your dream?”
"Mom, how did you know that becoming a teacher is my dream?" Yu Lele asked her mother with a smile.
The mother smiled: "How could I not know my own daughter?"
Yu Lele was slightly taken aback.
She had always thought that her mother didn't understand her. The scolding and nagging when she was a child, and the estrangement and loneliness after her father's death, she always thought that her mother didn't understand her.
But perhaps, she is the one who understands me best.
After a long while, Yu Lele finally looked up at her mother with a smile and said, "Mom, don't worry, I know what I'm doing. I'm all grown up now. I want to think carefully about what to do, how to do it, and where to do it."
Mom and Uncle Yu exchanged a glance and finally nodded.
Yu Lele tilted her head and saw Yu Tian grinning behind them. Their eyes met, and he reached out and made a victory sign at her.
Yu Lele also smiled.
20-2
Yu Lele's life is a perfect example of dramatic ups and downs.
In June, when almost everyone had already settled things, Yu Lele stood calmly with Lian Haiping on the seaside pier. The sky was high and the water was wide, the rippling waves reflected golden sunlight, seagulls swept across the sky and sea, their long cries adding a natural tranquility to the background of the bustling city traffic behind them.
Standing on this high pier, on the vast sea in the city, without ever going far, she began to miss it.
The future is like a hot air balloon with no discernible direction. She knows that boarding it can take her to great heights, but she doesn't know where the next gust of wind will take her.
What to do next has become an unknown mystery this June.
Or perhaps, it wasn't a mystery at all.
Because after such a long stalemate, a decision must eventually be made, right?
Future prospects or love, home or distant places, staying or parting—these are all choices that must be made.
Overnight, she fell from a high-ranking statue of a talented woman to the world, becoming an observer of everyone's path to happiness, carrying an uncertain fate, a sense of loss, and unspeakable pain, standing quietly outside the crowd.
In the entire Chinese Language and Literature Class 1 of the Chinese Department, there are not many people who have not signed an employment agreement, and I am one of them.
How do you look in other people's eyes right now?
Down on one's luck, lonely, isolated... these are words that are always present, and also, "pitiful".
Ten years ago, I would have felt depressed, even cursing the injustices of this or that; eight years ago, I would have felt grief, feeling abandoned by the world, and how could an abandoned child possibly seek justice? Six years ago, I would have felt frustrated, no longer in despair, but still sad; three years ago, I would have felt the world had turned upside down, unable to understand how my pursuit of perfection had turned me into this disheveled state... But today, none of that applies.
Ten years, is this what growing up is like?
As she grew older, she stopped blindly resenting "fate" and stopped blaming others for all her setbacks. While studying *Western Literary History*, she paid close attention to her teacher's discussion of the relationship between "character tragedy" and "fate tragedy." The teacher mentioned that Oedipus Rex's tragedy was a grand tragedy of fate; he killed his father and married his mother, was cursed by fate, and allowed his sorrow to permeate his entire life, moving the audience. The teacher said that such tragedies are more likely to leave a lasting impression on viewers and readers.
But life taught Yu Lele that tragic fates are rare in this world; there is never any divine blessing or predetermined fortune. Most tragedies in this world begin with tragic character traits.
Perhaps, the tragedy of many people's fate is simply a tragedy of their character.
She didn't want to be bound by so-called "fate," and she didn't believe that once you fall, you can never get up again.
As she stood in that bustling hall filling out the registration form, she knew that this was the path she had chosen, and so even if the road ahead was filled with storms, she could not regret it.
She guessed that Ren Yuan must have heard the news by now, and perhaps he would talk to her tomorrow. She wondered what he would say: would he approve of her choice, or would he advise her to give up?
However, she will persist no matter what.
In the distance stretched an unfathomable horizon, a pale blue sky, a deep blue ocean. In the cool sea breeze, she could feel Lian Haiping's gaze upon her. Four years had passed, and she was grateful that he had always been by her side. But now that he had given up such a great opportunity to stay, how could she possibly tell him that she was leaving?
Just as she mustered the courage to speak, he spoke first: "Xu Yin told me you saw him?"
It took her a few seconds to look into his eyes before she realized who the "he" he was referring to was.
She was lost in thought for a moment.
“Yes,” she finally nodded, smiling at him, “I saw him at the hospital that day.”
Lian Haiping fell silent. She saw the deep sorrow and grief in his eyes, perhaps only fleetingly, yet...
"Is he leaving again?" Lian Haiping finally asked.
"They must have left." Yu Lele smiled slightly as she looked at the distant sea, the sunlight casting a golden glow on her face, warm and vibrant.
She didn't tell Lian Haiping that she and Xu Chen never saw each other again after that encounter.
Although I knew he was right next to me, that we were breathing the same air in the same city, and that I wanted to visit him in the hospital every morning when I woke up, I still didn't contact him again.
They should have been just passersby in each other's lives long ago, shouldn't they?
The cycle of breaking up and getting back together is the kind of torment you only see in romance novels; if it didn't repeat itself, the story wouldn't be interesting.
Everyone loves a comedic ending after a tragic process. The tenacity and uncompromising spirit of those who finally reunite after overcoming hardships is the ideal in every reader's heart. However, life is not a novel, much less a drama.
So, she didn't tell everyone about her open and honest conversation with Xu Jianping after that day. It was still in the same coffee shop where they had negotiated two years prior. Xu Jianping hadn't aged, but Yu Lele's face showed a newfound composure. That day, Xu Jianping had asked Yu Lele the same question: "Did you see him?"
Yu Lele looked at her, her eyes filled with worry, lingering fear, hesitation, and anxiety...
Yu Lele told her firmly, "We will never be together again."
Xu Jianping was clearly stunned by this direct approach.
Yu Lele smiled and looked at her: "Auntie, you should know that Xu Chen is even more proud than me."
Yes, they are all proud people, people who need confidence and self-respect to survive. They have weathered life's storms, lost loved ones, felt betrayed, experienced loneliness, and lost their way—experiences that most people might take a lifetime to go through, they had already accomplished before the age of 20. They are more rational, more stubborn, and more resilient than most people; they need a kind of sacrifice and a kind of reward to tell themselves that their lives are full of value, not blemishes and flaws.
They need equal attention in life, not contempt, hostility, and disdain.
To this day, she still remembers the days she spent with Xu Chen, her cautiousness, her careful consideration, and how she had to be constantly wary of the traps of pride when she was with him. Those days were actually quite tiring.
However, they loved each other deeply at the time, which is why they were willing to grit their teeth and bear it.
At that time, I seemed to be deceiving myself, unwilling to consider that the harsh realities and constant storms of life might gradually erode our passion and faith, and that the love we were once willing to give up so much to hold onto might not withstand the daily grind. "Poverty-stricken couples face a hundred sorrows"—this desolate life will tell you that "poverty" doesn't just refer to material deprivation, because the blows of reality and the uncertainty of the future may be a man's most fatal wound.
This is not the future she wanted to give him.
Therefore, their life trajectories destined them to be different from those who could turn back. For them, once they gave up, it was very difficult to turn back.
So, this outcome may not be a bad thing for either of them.
It's just unfair to Lian Haiping.