Just as she was hesitating, her phone rang. Upon closer inspection, it was Xiaoxin—asking her to meet outside the mall.
After helping her choose a pair of sneakers, Xiaoxin took her around the women's clothing section to try on clothes.
Basically, every time You Ran tried on something, Xiao Xin would ask the salesperson to issue a receipt.
The clothes in the mall were too expensive for students. You Ran tried to stop him several times, but Xiao Xin insisted on paying and kept pulling her to continue shopping.
You Ran had no choice but to take a break while going to the toilet.
Looking at myself in the mirror in the bathroom, I felt a sense of melancholy in my eyes.
Something seemed to be on my mind.
It's about Qu Yun.
After all, he was hospitalized to help me avoid drinking, so shouldn't I call him to check on his safety?
He casually took out the slip of paper from his pocket and dialed the number on it.
The principal handed it to her just before she got off the bus; he seemed to know that You Ran definitely wouldn't save her ex-boyfriend's number.
Therefore, Principal Baozi is also a dangerous person.
She pressed the call button, but before she could even wait a second, You Ran abruptly hung up the phone as if she'd been scratched by a cat.
She didn't know why she did it.
I washed my face with water, took a deep breath, and walked out of the bathroom.
"There are many new arrivals on the third floor, let's go up and have a look." Xiaoxin seemed very excited.
"No, I'm tired," You Ran said, making up an excuse.
“When you go out with your friends, you can wear high heels all day without complaining.” Xiaoxin didn’t quite believe her.
You Ran remained silent.
Shin-chan stared at her quietly for a long time before finally saying, "Are you afraid of spending my money?"
This statement perfectly captured You Ran's thoughts, but she still concealed it: "It's not that I'm afraid, it's just that I feel it's unnecessary to buy so many."
"Didn't you once spend your entire month's allowance on a pair of jeans?" Xiao Xin, who had been a member of the You Ran Brothers, knew her past very well.
You Ran was speechless when asked the question.
"You feel uncomfortable spending my money, right?"
Shin-chan's voice became louder.
With people coming and going around them, You Ran disliked being stared at, so she pulled Xiao Xin to a corner of the mall and explained, "I just think that students don't need to buy things at this price point. After all, we're still freeloaders..."
Shin-chan calmly interrupted her: "So the ultimate reason you refused is that the money I spent on you wasn't money I earned myself, right?"
"That's not what I meant," You Ran quickly denied.
"Qu Yun's money is earned by himself, so you feel at ease using it, right?" Xiao Xin asked.
You Ran suddenly felt a little annoyed: "What does our business have to do with him? Why do we always have to bring him up every time we argue?"
"Do you really believe he's not among us?" Xiaoxin asked You Ran.
"Don't you find this exhausting?" You Ran asked. "You have to involve him in everything, and you even try to compare yourself to him, to become like him, whether intentionally or unintentionally. Is that meaningful?"
“Because I want you to like me.” Shin-chan’s eyes were clear and black, clear yet full of depth: “Because you like him so much, I thought, if I were a little more like him, would you fall in love with me a little more too?”
You Ran shook her head: "I loved him before because I was stupid."
"So, you haven't come back to your senses yet," Xiaoxin said quietly, his voice like the incense smoke in a temple, a wisp of white rising faintly.
After a long pause, You Ran finally said, "I don't want to argue with you when you're emotionally out of control... Let's go back."
After saying that, You Ran turned to leave, but Xiao Mi grabbed her arm and didn't say anything.
The two remained locked in a stalemate when You Ran's phone rang.
Utada Hikaru's "Prisonen of Love" echoed repeatedly in my pocket, then stopped, then started playing again.
You Ran didn't notice at first, but when she realized the phone call she made in the bathroom, her body suddenly tensed up.
Xiao Xin naturally noticed her unusual behavior. He reached into You Ran's clothes, snatched the phone, flipped it open, and listened without saying a word.
After only two sentences were exchanged, Xiaoxin hung up the phone.
Shin-chan tries his best to keep his expressions normal, but subtle muscle twitches still reveal his fluctuating emotions.
"Qu Yun asked...you called him five minutes ago, was there something you wanted to say?"
You Ran was caught off guard and stood there stunned.
"So, while I was waiting for you in the bathroom, you were inside making a phone call to him... Do you think that behavior can still convince people that he's not between us?" Xiaoxin's voice was much lower and hoarse than usual, like the thick clouds before a storm that could crush a person's spine.
"I'm looking for him for something else." You Ran quickly searched for words that would least provoke Xiao Xin's suspicions and anger.
Xiao Xin remained silent; he had never been so silent before, as if even his breathing had ceased.
"Can you calm down and listen to my explanation?" You Ran asked.
Shin-chan uttered two words in a low voice: "Okay."
Just as You Ran felt a little relieved, Xiao Xin's next words, shrouded in icy coldness, entered his ears along with the sound of his phone hitting the ground: "But not today."
You Ran felt as if she had been frozen solid, staring blankly at the fragments of the phone on the battlefield, and... Xiao Xin's departing figure.
Not today, not tomorrow, not the day after tomorrow.
For five whole days, Shin-chan didn't appear in front of him.
He didn't want to see her—You Ran had gone to see him several times, but all her attempts had been fruitless.
With her relationship in trouble, You Ran lost all interest in doing anything and managed to memorize less than ten English words in five days.
He spends his days leisurely sitting on the bed, hugging his calves with both hands and resting his chin on his knees, showing a tendency to develop into a sculpture.
In my mind, I started to replay my chaotic emotions over and over again.
The reason she started dating Shin-chan was for that tiny bit of possibility of getting him to stay.
But the current situation is even harder to accept than his departure; it's as if all the beautiful memories have turned sour.
During this period, Xiaoxin was unhappy. He gave up many things he truly loved and forced himself to do things he didn't want to do.
He gave up playing online games, reading comics, going to anime conventions, and playing basketball with others...
He stopped doing everything that people his age would normally do.
The purpose was to get closer to Qu Yun.
But he forgot that he was Long Xiang, and this distortion of identity made the happiness between the two invisible.
You Ran has to be constantly aware of whether her behavior will arouse his suspicion, which is a very tiring process.
Their former playful banter and frolicking have vanished, replaced by suspicion, a sense of walking on thin ice, and an inability to trust.
You Ran understood that if things continued this way, she would never reach the point she hoped for.
Just as her already not-so-pointed chin was about to be pressed into a basin, Shin-chan called: "Let's talk."
It's time to talk.
When the call came, You Ran was setting up the venue in the college's lecture hall. Since it was almost over, she asked the other students to leave first and stayed behind to tidy up and wait.
Soon after, Shin-chan arrived.
You Ran stopped what she was doing, looked at him, and after a long while, uttered a sentence: "Give me back my phone."
Shin-chan: "..."
After catching his breath, Shin-chan focused his eyes on the tangled ribbons he was struggling to untangle and whispered, "What should we do next?"
The voice was calm and composed, as if it had been carefully considered.
"Are you asking me?" You Ran squatted down and pulled off the tangled ribbon from Xiao Xin's foot.
Shin-chan's eyes were like the dull, lifeless black vinyl record of winter.
"Why did things turn out this way?" he asked, unsure whether he was asking himself or You Ran.
You Ran shook her head; she also wanted to figure this out.
“I originally thought that the only problem between us was that you didn’t consider me someone worthy of pursuing you; I originally thought that as long as we got past this hurdle, everything would be resolved. But when we got to this point, I realized that the biggest problem between us was Qu Yun,” Xiao Xin said softly.
"You think there's still some connection between him and me, right?" You Ran asked.
“You care about him, and I care about him too. Because of these two different kinds of caring, he has always been standing between us, hindering the development of our relationship.” Xiao Xin believes that it is all Qu Yun’s fault.
"Do you really think so?" You Ran used her foot to hook a ribbon.
At least one part of the body should have something to do.
"It's not a matter of whether I think it or not, it's simply the truth." Shin-chan looked at her, his eyes deep and dark.
"What should I do?" You Ran's voice was soft and weary. "Tell me, what should I do?"
"Make a choice," Shin-chan answered.
"What about the questions and options?" You Ran asked.
Xiaoxin took out a plane ticket and handed it to You Ran.
You Ran didn't take it, but looked at him with an expression that needed an answer.
Xiao Xin stepped forward and shoved the plane ticket into her hand: "You Ran, although the process wasn't as smooth as I imagined, at least we've truly dated once, and I no longer feel resentful. During this time, we've been deceiving ourselves into maintaining a facade of happiness and peace, and the reason for this is largely due to my lack of self-confidence... If this continues, we'll both be ruined."
Yes, he nodded leisurely. This can't go on.
"I think what I need most is your affirmation. I want to be sure that I am important to you," Xiaoxin said slowly. "So, Youran, I need you to make a choice."
"There are still twenty days until the holiday. During this time, I won't bother you. I just hope you can think carefully about whether... you really want to be with me." Xiaoxin's hair was jet black and lustrous under the light, shimmering with a clear light. "If you are willing, come to the airport on the day of your holiday and go to Hainan with me. If you don't come, I won't force you anymore, and I will never... bother you again."
After they finished speaking, a heavy silence fell between them.
As if he had nothing more to say, Shin-chan felt it was time to leave: "Then, I'll wait for your decision."
After saying that, he turned and left.
You Ran looked down at the plane ticket in her hand, and her eyes suddenly felt a little stinging.
However, after taking only two or three steps, Xiaoxin suddenly stopped. The next second, he quickly returned, reached out, and pulled You Ran into his arms.