There were more than 500 Meng Yi soldiers patrolling inside Xiao Mansion alone, and at least 2,000 more on the outer perimeter. With someone tipping them off, Imperial Guards kept pouring in from all directions, marching in orderly formations and gathering around General Wang and his men. In no time, they surrounded General Wang and his men like a small red dot on a steamed bun.
General Wang, assessing the situation, slowly drew his longsword and said somberly, "General Meng, please don't put me in a difficult position. If you don't step back, we'll have no choice but to fight." This Comrade Wang was still stubbornly determined to carry out his king's orders.
Meng Yi said expressionlessly, "You should be the one not making things difficult for me." After saying that, he didn't say anything more and just stood there blocking my way.
As General Wang drew his sword, his men hesitantly drew their weapons as well. It wasn't necessarily that these men were particularly loyal; even if they laid down their weapons now, they might not survive. Besides, as soldiers, desertion in the face of battle would only result in them facing trial.
The situation immediately became serious. Seeing that the enemy still intended to resist, Meng Yi's army suddenly had the spearmen in the front row lower their bodies at the same time, revealing the crossbowmen behind them. Thousands of crossbow bolts surrounded the 100 or so men, and General Wang and his men were basically trapped.
Those old men were already terrified at the sight. When the king arrested Xiao Ni, it was certainly a time to beat a dog when it was down, but they never expected that the dog would suddenly transform into... a dog in distress. Should they continue to be the king's loyal subjects or should a wise man avoid unnecessary trouble? That is the question!
Wang XX, who had reprimanded me first, suddenly pointed at General Wang and cursed, "Wang XX (this XX is General Wang's name), you traitor! You dare to forge the king's decree and plot to harm the King of Qi! I knew you were a scoundrel long ago!" That was a brilliant move; it avoided immediate losses and prevented anyone from finding fault with you.
At that time, General Wang was inside, and Meng Yi's army was outside. In reality, the outcome of this battle was a foregone conclusion. The only difference was that if General Wang's men attacked first, our soldiers would suffer a few casualties; but if our men attacked first, General Wang and his men would be shot into the wall within two minutes. Seeing Meng Yi's predicament, several of Meng Yi's captains turned to me and asked, "Principal, should we kill them or not?"
Hmm, those lines sound so familiar...
Seeing that I remained silent, they urged, "Principal, should we kill them or not?" There was no other choice now; striking first was the best course of action. General Wang and his men could launch a suicidal attack at any moment, and the losses would be devastating. Finally, a few of them asked again, "Principal, should we kill them or not?"
Then several thousand soldiers shouted in unison, "Principal, kill or not? Principal, kill or not..."
Before I could even speak, Wang XX and my father-in-law Li XX loudly urged, "Principal, not killing this man is not enough to uphold the laws of Qin—Principal, kill him!" A dozen or so old men immediately understood that this was a golden opportunity to kill him, silence him, and shift the blame to Jiangdong, and they immediately joined in shouting, "Principal, kill him! Principal, kill him!"
Chapter Ninety-Nine: Paste-Making Children and Marriages
What's the point of killing?!
It's fine to have the thrill of having the power of life and death, but do you really think you can kill the fat guy's people? It's like someone kindly lending you their phone and saying "use it as you please," but would you really have the nerve to use their phone to solicit prostitution?
But this feeling is really great. Just think about it, with just one word from you, hundreds of lives can be lost. How satisfying is that? No wonder the fat man can't even afford a bowl of egg and tomato noodles, yet he still clings to his emperor title. Men, after all, live for this power.
However, I pretended to hesitate for a moment—I couldn't let them see that I was afraid of blood.
General Wang and his men stared intently at my mouth; everyone had a will to survive, and they weren't willing to die until the very last moment. A group of old men continued to clamor, "Principal, kill! Principal, kill!"
I waved my hand, and everyone quieted down. I said loudly, "We can't kill them!" I could see that Meng Yi let out a long sigh of relief after I said that. General Wang and the others, needless to say, had just gone through a life-or-death situation. If they hadn't been in such a dangerous situation, they would have collapsed long ago.
My father-in-law, Li XX, said, "Principal, these people must be killed to appease public anger!"
I glared at him. If it weren't for his willingness to offer his daughter to me as part of my harem, I would have slapped him long ago. These old guys, led by Wang XX and my father-in-law, are hoping I'll kill General Wang on the wall. The bigger the commotion, the busier Fatty will be dealing with me, and the easier it will be for them to slip through in the chaos.
I shouted, "General Wang and his men have done nothing wrong. They all serve the King; how can they turn on each other? There's a huge misunderstanding here..." Standing before my mountain-like guards, I looked across at General Wang and said, "I guarantee that as long as you don't charge forward, we will absolutely not harm you. Give me some time; if I'm not mistaken, the King's new orders will arrive soon..."
Before I could finish speaking, the sound of horses' hooves came from afar, and a sharp, bright voice, filled with fear, shouted: "By order of the King, General Wang, return to the palace immediately and do not enter the Xiao Mansion!"
When we got closer, we saw that this man was the eunuch from Qin Shi Huang's side, the one who had searched me before I entered the palace. He ran over and, seeing that we hadn't yet made a move, immediately relaxed, exaggeratedly patting his chest and giggling, "You scared me to death! I thought there was already a river of blood here!" He pushed through the layers of encirclement and came to General Wang, who was still somewhat stunned, saying, "His Majesty's decree is that General Wang, upon seeing me, immediately return to the palace and must not harm a single hair on King Qi's head!"
This decree was less a pardon for me and more a pardon for General Wang and his men. At this point, if he had no other choice, that bastard would have been willing to confront me head-on. Upon hearing this, he was overjoyed and exclaimed, "Your humble servant obeys!" He then knelt before me and said in a trembling voice, "King Qi, I owe you one life, and my brothers owe you a hundred lives. From now on, whatever you need us for, we brothers will die for you."
He knew in his heart that if I had just gestured, he would have been riddled with bullets by now. I had almost swallowed my pride to save their lives when I could have easily killed him; that was a huge favor. Judging from his genuine expression, I figured if I were to actually rebel now, he would probably follow me.
I patted him on the shoulder and said, "Alright, it's just a misunderstanding, don't take it to heart."
The group of old men immediately beamed with joy, saying, "So it was all a misunderstanding! Hahaha, we were worried for nothing." With this decree, the old men felt reassured. They had gone from being drowning dogs to auspicious unicorns, and even the king had issued a pardon. This time, they no longer needed to have any psychological barriers to currying favor with the King of Qi. In an instant, flattery poured in like a tide.
Suddenly someone exclaimed in surprise, "Blood! There's blood on King Qi's trousers!"
I looked down and saw a patch of redness at the base of my thigh, with blood spreading down my trouser leg. It was the blood sac I had tied to my thigh earlier; it must have burst when I wasn't paying attention while dealing with the emergency.
An old man blurted out, "King Qi was so scared he wet his pants!" He immediately realized he'd said the worst thing he could ever say, and his face turned pale. Sure enough, the others didn't even give him a chance to cover up his slip of the tongue, shouting indignantly, "How could you slander King Qi like that? That's clearly blood!"
The man who was refuted immediately wet his pants – he had indeed wet them.
Wang XX glanced at my crotch and exclaimed, "King Qi is clearly so angry with you that he's urinating blood!"
Because this area of my body is extremely sensitive and there was no injury, it would be hard to convince everyone if it wasn't urine. That's why Wang XX came up with this absurd excuse: blood in urine. Generally speaking, blood sounds much better than urine. The King of Qi urinating blood out of anger conveys a sense of intense indignation and the impending doom of a hero, which is far better than the King of Qi being so frightened that he wet his pants. Similarly, this theory applies to a broader perspective: a hero can be so angry that he vomits blood, but spitting phlegm out of anger is less convincing.
This time, my cheap father-in-law, Li XX, didn't refute Wang XX. Instead, he pointed at General Wang and said, "Oh dear, you're finished. You angered the King of Qi to the point of urinating blood on your first meeting. Just wait for your entire family to be executed!"
General Wang glanced at me with an embarrassed expression. To bolster his own prestige, Li XX said smugly, "To be honest, my daughter has always admired Prince Qi. To fulfill her wish, I've decided to marry her to him..." He then turned to me with a fawning smile, "I just don't know if our Li family has the honor?"
I quickly returned the greeting with a smile, saying, "You're too kind."
Who would have thought that I, Xiaoqiang, could finally ruin the children of officials! Baozi is pregnant now, which is the golden opportunity for a man to cheat. It has laid a solid foundation for me to keep a mistress, although it's a long way off, but at least it will be done without anyone knowing!
Wang XX, who was standing to the side, couldn't stand Li XX's smug look and couldn't help but whisper, "Your daughter looks like a pancake, how dare you get married?"
I asked in surprise, "What does 'sticky pancake' look like?" I didn't expect that sticky pancakes existed in the Warring States period.
One of Meng Yi's soldiers pulled out a flatbread to show me—they probably carried it as marching rations. It was neither square nor round, and quite dark; its appearance was rather unappealing. Looking at the amused expressions on the faces of the others, I figured Wang XX's description was probably true, so I immediately dismissed my earlier thought. I already had a steamed bun at home; if I were to find another flatbread, was I going to get married or open a breakfast stall? Besides, we didn't even have a bowl of porridge—it was too dry!
Just then, another eunuch rode up in front of us on horseback, brandishing his whip and shouting menacingly, "Make way! Make way!"
He rushed up to us, and the eunuch who had just delivered the imperial decree recognized him and said, "Eunuch Xu, is it His Majesty who sent you to deliver the decree to recall General Wang? I have already done so."
Without even glancing at anyone else, Eunuch Xu suddenly addressed General Wang, saying, "His Majesty has decreed that you have not yet returned to the palace. Quickly bring me Xiao's head!"
Everyone was stunned. General Wang, who was standing next to me at that moment, asked in bewilderment, "Didn't His Majesty just issue a pardon? Should I kill King Qi or not?"
Xu Gonggong rolled his eyes and said, "I'm only responsible for relaying the king's orders, nothing else."
Among the ministers, someone whispered, "The King has changed his mind again." Another agreed, "I'm afraid this time his mind is made up." Wang XX slapped her father, Li XX, on the shoulder and said, "Now is your time to show your resolve. Which side are you on?"
Li XX said seriously, "I've thought it over. My daughter is too ugly to be worthy of the Prince of Qi. I'll let her take care of me in my old age and see me off in my final days." He spoke politely, but he slid a few steps away from me and stood far away.
After delivering the decree, Eunuch Xu sat on his horse and stared at General Wang. General Wang looked at him and then at me, his expression extremely unnatural. In the end, he had no choice but to draw his sword again. Meng Yi stepped in front of me and stood in front, angrily saying, "You fickle..." He stopped abruptly, because he realized that it was actually his master, Qin Shi Huang, who was fickle, not General Wang.
General Wang drew his sword, and his men had no choice but to draw their weapons again. Meng Yi's men then pointed their weapons at them as well. However, this time the atmosphere was less tense. The two sides looked at each other, more like underlings in a gang negotiation, waiting for their boss to speak.