This subtle change on the field naturally alerted Liu Bang, who had also sobered up considerably. He stood up and said, "I need to ask for your permission, General, please forgive me." With that, he slowly retreated to the door and walked out.
I casually clasped my hands in a fist and said, "I'll also ask for your help, Qiang." Then I hurried out. I need to see what that Liu Bang kid has been up to. Now that things have come to this, it's impossible to get Xiang Yu to give him the medicine. I'll see if I can find another opportunity; if not, I'll just have to send him away and that'll be the end of it. It seems that old man Fan Zeng won't give up until he achieves his goal; Liu Bang staying in Xiang Yu's camp is ultimately not safe.
When I went outside, I saw this guy clutching his crotch, asking the guard where the outhouse was. He was probably really desperate. I followed him into the restroom. Just as I entered, he unzipped his pants, turned around, saw me, and, unsure what to say, could only give me an awkward smile. Sometimes we encounter similar awkward situations at banquets: one moment everyone was impeccably dressed, the next they're all legs spread, heads bowed, looking like idiots in a desperate hurry—I don't know what women encounter in the restroom, but that's how men are. So what's a good conversation starter in this situation? A handshake feels a bit disgusting, asking "Have you eaten?" is a bit inappropriate…
I could only nod to Liu Bang and ask, "Where is the Duke of Pei?"
Liu Bang said awkwardly, "Ah, yes, you've come too?"
"They're here, they're here, hehe..."
"hey-hey……"
Then we each focused on our own tasks, directing the water jets. Liu Bang, while intently rinsing his own spot, casually remarked, "Xiao Qiang—if I remember correctly, you're the General Xiao who smiled slightly at Zhang Han's 100,000-strong army, right?"
I exclaimed in surprise, "Oh, Liu Bang knows me?"
What I find strange is that, judging from Zhang Liang's tone, he probably didn't know about my glorious deeds. Of course, it's also possible that my in-laws deliberately didn't mention it for some reason. But in any case, this shows that Liu Bang wasn't idle; he was keeping track of what kind of people were in Xiang Yu's camp and what they were doing.
Liu Bang remarked, "Among the heroes of our time, besides General Xiang Yu, I fear General Xiao is the only one who can be considered truly outstanding."
I quickly replied, "That's too kind of you." But only he could say that to me; anyone else would have thought more wrong. Besides the Xiang family, only I have the surname Xiao. Isn't this a bit of a provocation?
Liu Bang sighed again, "It's a pity that Ji Rong has spent half his life in the military but has never been able to get a general like him to help him. Otherwise, Ji would have treated him with the respect due to an elder brother, never leaving his side. From now on, he would give half of every grain of rice he obtains to the general."
This sounds like they're saying if someone as talented as me gets in, they'll give me half the shares. Liu Bang was really drunk; normally, even if he had such thoughts, he'd definitely test the waters before daring to make a move. I snorted and said, "That's not fair of you; you're openly poaching someone's talent."
"Ouch..." Although Liu Bang didn't fully understand what I meant, he could tell I was unhappy, and his hand trembled—he wet his pants. But this kid reacted quickly, pretending to be drunk and asking blankly, "General Xiao, why are you upset? Did I act recklessly after drinking?"
I could only manage a dry laugh.
After shaking his head a few times, Liu Bang began to fasten his trousers—as for why he shook them, only he knew. In the instant he turned to leave, he suddenly lowered his voice, as if muttering to himself or to me, "Ji Yan speaks from the bottom of his heart; General, consider your own words."
I chased after him and saw him heading towards the dining room. I shouted, "Hey, where are you going?"
Liu Bang was taken aback: "Go back."
I slapped my thigh and said, "Why would we go back? Are you waiting for us to kill you?"
Liu Bang shrank back: "What kind of talk is this?"
“If it were before, you would have been dead twice over by now,” I said, pointing to the gate of the mansion. “Hurry up and leave.”
Liu Bang was taken aback, then turned and ran.
"Stop!" I was furious. How could this person just run away like that? Even if he abandoned Zhang Liang, he should at least have had time to say something polite to me, right?
Liu Bang turned around and said, "Huh?"
I held out my hand in front of him: "Didn't you prepare any gifts for General Xiang when you came?"
Liu Bang suddenly realized, took out a pair of jade cups from his bosom and placed them in my hand, then walked backwards while saying, "I will remember General Xiao's kindness and will repay it generously in the future."
I waved my hand and said, "Go on, go on." If I reveal it later, wouldn't that be rape?
They didn't find an opportunity to give Liu Bang the medicine, but they managed to get rid of him. Xiang Yu's enthusiasm may have misled him, making him think he was absolutely safe, but Fan Zeng still had to be wary.
I walked back carrying a pair of jade cups. These little things were square and translucent, clearly genuine artifacts. Sure enough, as I reached the door, I saw soldiers rapidly gathering and mobilizing around. It seemed Old Fan wanted to emulate Xiang Yu's desperate, all-or-nothing strategy.
I went in, placed the two bowls on the table, and said, "Pei Gong has had too much to drink. He said he's very unhappy and wants to apologize to the King and go back first."
Xiang Yu gave an "oh" and didn't say anything more. Zhang Liang seemed used to Liu Bang abandoning him and fleeing, and calmly stood up, saying, "Since that's the case, Zifang will also take his leave. Thank you for your hospitality, Your Majesty." He then glared fiercely at Xiang Bo. I saw him to the door and exchanged a few polite words. Zhang Liang looked at me with a questioning gaze, as if to say, "Whose side are you really on?"
After seeing Zhang Liang off, Fan Zeng stood up, his beard bristling and eyes wide, and suddenly drew his long sword at the pair of jade cups on the table. I beat him to it, kicking both little things to the ground and smashing them to pieces—they were so beautiful, I couldn't bear to let anyone else cut them. I'm not the kind of psychopath who destroys what he can't have, but if something is destined to be destroyed, then I might as well destroy it myself.
Unable to vent his anger, Fan Zeng pointed at Xiang Yu in a fit of rage, but ultimately realized it was inappropriate, so he switched his finger to my head, stamped his foot, and seemed about to express some sentiment. Before he could utter a single word, I interrupted him, shouting, "Alright, alright, I admit I'm a coward and not worth discussing things with!"
Fan Zeng: "..."
Chapter 136 Xuanzang
After finishing this most famous meal in history, I finally breathed a sigh of relief. At least for now, things were peaceful with Xiang Yu, and all that remained was for his final battle with Liu Bang. He said he would defeat Liu Bang and then do him a favor, but no one could predict what would happen next, which was quite nerve-wracking. However, I knew Xiang Yu's character; he was capable of anything if you didn't let him fulfill his wish, so I gave up trying to dissuade him.
After finishing things here, I asked Ersha, "What are you going to do? Go back?"
Ersha nervously moved back a little and said, "I'm not leaving!"
Xiang Yu said, "Let him stay with me."
I knew Ersha was afraid of going back to that boring, shameful life, so I nodded and said, "Then I have to go back quickly. We don't care about the Seven Sages of the Bamboo Grove, but we really can't wait for those eighteen lords of the Sui and Tang dynasties—I wonder who exactly they are?"
Ersha suddenly adopted the tone of a storyteller and declared confidently, "The Sui and Tang Dynasties Heroes' Chronicle has eighteen heroes. The first is Li Yuanba, the Overlord of the Western Prefecture, who wields a pair of eight-hundred-pound golden hammers. He is the fiercest general in this book, and no one can compare to him. The second hero is Yuwen Chengdu, the great general of the Tianbao era, who wields a pair of phoenix-winged gilded halberds..."
I quickly said, "Wait a minute! Ke Zi, do you know who these eighteen people are?"
Ersha said discontentedly, "Don't interrupt me."
I quickly tried to appease him, saying, "Okay, okay, please continue."
Ersha: "Use a pair of phoenix-winged gilded halberds...use a pair of phoenix wings..."
I asked anxiously, "What happens next?"
The simpleton chuckled and said, "I can't remember..."
I:"……"