I gestured to Shanzhu, who understood and immediately came forward to help me to a seat. How did she end up here? I hadn't even gone to look for her yet, and she came to me on her own. Well, that's fine; it saves me some trouble.
"Your Majesty, I pay my respects to the Noble Consort." Perhaps it was because I had brushed up on the palace etiquette after that visit, but this time I was more confident than when I greeted her with an insufficient tone last time.
"Get up, little sister. What brings you here to your older sister?" These past two days I've been busy serving the Emperor. How could Xuebin let her come here without my permission? Aren't you afraid I'll cause her trouble again? I do have this wicked sense of humor. It's not like I'm going to protect her wholeheartedly. I still feel a bit aggrieved. Even though I agreed to it, I still want to mess with them.
"Since entering the palace, I have not paid my respects to Your Majesty. I am filled with fear. Today, I have come to pay my respects to apologize and beg Your Majesty to forgive me." Consort Lan spoke very logically, but still left no room for criticism. Now that she has said this, if I were to pursue the matter further, it would be my fault. The palace has never needed a consort who is too petty on the surface; this is jealousy.
"Look at what you're saying, little sister. I know you've been favored by the Emperor since you entered the palace, and even I get to share in the glory. It's inevitable that you might neglect your greetings. How can you apologize? You're now in the Emperor's heart, so I wouldn't dare to blame you." Anyone can say fancy words. That's right, I'm going to provoke her. Just thinking about how hesitant she is makes me uncomfortable. We're both women, so why is there such a big difference? I will never say that I'm jealous, never.
"Your Majesty, I am terrified. Your Highness is also the Emperor's darling. How can I compare to Your Majesty?" Consort Lan rose and knelt down, her eyes lowered, her tone becoming somewhat disordered. I could only guess a little of the reason, but I was not so terrified as to be able to guess everything about other people's thoughts.
"My darling, hehe, my sister is really good at joking. Everyone in the palace is watching who the Emperor favors. Saying these things now makes me wonder." I didn't let her get up. I continued to play with my long fingernails with a cold smile. My tone was sharp and my aura was overwhelming.
"Your Majesty, I dare not. These are my heartfelt words," Consort Lan said, lowering her head even further and her hands beginning to tremble.
"Please forgive me, Your Highness. What you said was entirely true, and every word you spoke was absolutely true." Peony, who was next to Consort Lan, also knelt down. Her voice was so loud that it sounded jarring to me. She was as if she was afraid of breaking under her knees.
"Hehe, little sister, what's wrong? I was just joking with you. Get up." I put on a gentle face, as if the solemn face from just now wasn't mine.
"Yes," Consort Lan stood up with the help of Peony, no longer daring to say anything more, and just stared at me intently.
I sighed inwardly. I must have frightened her. But there are many people in the palace who are more capable than me. If she's frightened like this now, how will she ever survive in the palace again?
"Little sister, I have a few words to say to you. If you understand, remember them; if you don't, then memorize them and keep them in your mind. Otherwise, I won't help you anymore." I decided it was better to make things clear.
"So it turns out that Sister really was arranged by Xuebin to help me." Consort Lan stopped trembling and looked at me with joy. How could she not be happy? She used to think that Xuebin liked this lady very much, and her heart ached so much. Now that this matter is clear, her heart is clear too. It turns out that he only loves me.
"Don't be too happy yet. You should know that if you're worthless, I won't help you," I said coldly. This Consort Lan's thinking remained naive.
"Sister" Lan Fei was stunned. How come this was different from what Xue Bin said? Didn't she say that she would definitely help?
"Consort Lan, listen to me carefully. In this palace, having the Emperor's true love doesn't guarantee safety. If you don't want to die a horrible death, obediently do and learn what I say. If you remain stubborn, don't blame me for not helping you." My tone became even sharper, showing no mercy. This woman needs a good talking-to.
"And do you really think having the emperor's love is all that matters?" I took the teacup from Mangosteen, took a sip, and waited quietly.
"No, sister, Lan'er doesn't want to compete with the people in the palace for anything. I just want to have my own little world to be with Xuebin," Consort Lan said softly, with a hint of shyness and sadness. She was refuting me.
I was furious. I really hate women like that. They can't see the truth. What's the use of being smart if they've used it all on love? Their brains have gone rotten. "Since you've said that, then let me tell you, don't think that just because you have his love, everything will be fine. This harem doesn't need the emperor's love. What I'm telling you is that once you enter this harem, you have to understand the rules here. Sharing favor is a given. As for dominating favor, it depends on whether you have the ability to enjoy the emperor's love to the fullest and establish a certain status in the palace so that no one dares to provoke you. Hmph, with your attitude, you'll probably die in this palace in a few months." Anyone could hear the disdain in my tone.
"No, sister, can't I even have the emperor's love?" Consort Lan slumped against the table, and Peony quickly supported her. She didn't say anything, because what the Noble Consort said was true, and her mistress needed to recognize the facts.
"Haha, everyone in the palace wants the emperor's love. To be frank, your love is nothing to me. Since you chose to fall in love with the ruler of a country, since you chose to enter the palace, since you love the emperor and your family has received imperial favor, then regardless of whether you love the emperor or not, you have to learn the rules of the harem. These harem rules cannot be broken by anyone, including you." My words were like pearls, striking her heart with every sentence.
After a long, long silence, Consort Lan finally said, "Sister, I understand."
"Sister, I take my leave." Then Consort Lan staggered to her feet. It seemed that what I said had greatly affected her. Peony also knelt down to pay her respects and then helped her slowly walk out of the palace.
I smiled with relief. Good that you understand. I didn't want all my hard work to be wasted on a fool.
Chapter 103
"Your Highness," Shanzhu went down to get me a fresh cup of hot tea. At that moment, several palace maids knelt down with their heads bowed and eyes lowered, and respectfully placed the pastries on the table. Shanzhu inserted her silver needle into the middle of the pastry, looked at it, and seeing nothing amiss, waved for them to leave. She stood beside me with her head bowed, looked up at me with a puzzled expression, but ultimately did not ask any questions.
I didn't drink the tea, but casually picked up a piece of pastry, took a small bite, and brushed the crumbs off my hands with a handkerchief. After a moment's thought, a thought struck me, and I instructed Shanzhu beside me, "Shanzhu, spread the word that I'm pregnant. Be swift and decisive, don't give anyone any ammunition." Then I tapped the table, and added, "Tonight, summon the Emperor to my residence. Tell him that I have had some business with him."
"This, Your Majesty, is perhaps inappropriate?" Mangosteen expressed her opinion somewhat hesitantly.
"Do whatever I tell you to do. Don't forget, I'm still your master." My calm tone carried an undeniable sharpness as I raised a finger to my lips. "As for anything else, you'd better keep your mouth shut and don't let me find out you've done anything wrong."
"Yes, but Your Majesty, I am just a palace maid, His Majesty may not come." Shan Zhu's hair covered her eyes, making it impossible to see the meaning in her eyes, but she still spoke in her usual light tone.
"No, go and tell him he's definitely back. Don't think I don't know who you are. I never keep danger around me." I curled the corners of my lips and picked up the pastry to eat, exuding an air of dignified elegance.
"Yes, Shanzhu understands." A chill ran through Shanzhu's heart, but as a bodyguard, she quickly recovered and left.
As evening approached, after Shanzhu served me my meal, I told her to leave. I put on the light gauze dress, but this time I wore a pale blue outer garment. The snow country was beginning to get cold. I hadn't felt anything in the morning, but at night, a cool breeze was blowing. Although it wasn't very cold, it was easy to catch a cold if you weren't careful. As usual, I followed my instincts and walked to the peach blossom grove. Tonight, I walked very slowly, each step a little difficult, pausing several times, but I still made up my mind to continue. Smelling the peach blossoms, I arrived at the center of the grove. I didn't know if he had come. Although I had martial arts skills, his were far superior, and I still couldn't detect his breathing or footsteps. I could only walk to a peach tree and face it. No matter what, I couldn't let him know that I was blind. Otherwise, it wouldn't be so easy for me to leave later.
The tired, hoarse voice that had been uttering the words "You've come" was gone, replaced by a magnetic and gentle tone, like the lyre played by Apollo, the ancient Greek sun god.
"Speak, what do you want to talk about?" I lowered my head, not turning around, and ran my hand over the dial line to hide my nervousness.
"What do you want to talk about? I've been looking for you for two years," Jue said in a slightly hurried tone, but still didn't step forward.
"I don't think we're right for each other. Let's break up," I said with difficulty, forcing back my tears.
"Why?" Jue stood there silently, quietly, as if centuries had passed. There were no painful cries, no sorrowful sobs, only fragments of heartbroken dust, reflecting the man's shadow, equally incomplete.
"Why? Do you really love me?" I couldn't help but shed tears. I finally asked the question, finally asked it. The question that had tormented me for two years finally came out of my mouth. For the past two years, I had been struggling and suffering over this answer every moment.
"Are you questioning me?" Jue's originally enthusiastic face turned cold, like the cold wind of December, chilling him to the bone. The peach blossoms at his feet turned into fragments, swirling and flying towards me.
I felt the heaviness in the air behind me, and continued, "Do you think I wanted this? But I had to force myself to ask. For two years, I've been thinking about why I fell in love with you, why I even existed in this world. For two years, I haven't found the answer. I'm filled with fear and uncertainty, all for this one answer from you. You've never said you love me, never." I bit my lower lip, trying to draw blood, controlling my choked sobs. I was still truly confused about what had happened between us.
"Can't you see what I've done?" Jue still didn't answer. He was heartbroken and in pain. He just uttered this sentence in a low voice.
"Heh, you still won't tell me. Well then, let me ask you another question: Am I really your lover, or am I just a substitute?" I tasted the bitterness of tears, mixed with blood from my lower lip, so bitter I wanted to vomit.
"What do you mean by that?" Jue's expression grew even colder. At this moment, his expression was exactly the same as when he killed someone, only the murderous intent was gone.
"What do you mean, Jue? Stop lying to me, okay? I'll do whatever you want, as long as... as long as you let me leave after you've done those things, I won't bother you anymore, and you shouldn't bother me either." Unable to bear the pain in my body, I slowly squatted down, hugged my legs, and murmured.
"What are you saying?" Without my knowledge, Jue pulled me up and made me face him. Anger and rage filled his mind. He just wanted to make this woman wake up.
I was scared. I lowered my head, not daring to look at him, and desperately held back my tears.
"Look at me and say it again," Jue forcefully pulled my head up, tightening her grip around me, and frowned as she looked at the woman in her arms.
"No," I swept him away with the moonlight beam, flying a meter away from him. Then I wiped away my tears with a handkerchief, but my head remained bowed.
"You know martial arts? I want you to explain yourself clearly today." Jue was somewhat surprised by Xue'er's martial arts skills, but she still spoke domineeringly, and her determination made me panic.
He flew towards me, so I had to rely on my senses to send the Moonlight Barrier at him, while ensuring that I wouldn't hurt him, just to force him back. However, I overestimated my martial arts skills. No matter how much I practiced, my martial arts skills could never surpass the ultimate level, let alone my lightness skills.
"Xue'er," he hugged me tightly, grabbing my chin with his hand without hurting me, staring intently at me.
I struggled desperately, but I couldn't move at all, and he forced me to stare directly at him.
"Your eyes!" she glared, her expression turning menacing. "Who did this?"
"Don't look," I whispered, tears welling in my eyes, pleading with him in the darkness.
"Tell me, who did this?" His murderous aura surged, and I knew he was very angry. A strange feeling stirred within me, but I dared not think about it anymore.
I didn't speak; I remained silent and unresponsive to him.
"Wait, what you're holding is the Moon Frame, you are the master of the Moon Frame!" Jue's anger surged even higher. If Leng Tian were here, he would definitely stay far away. At this moment, the air pressure suddenly dropped.
I know he's smart, so smart that I want to make him stupid. I know he's thought of that, but I still didn't say anything, only my tears flowed even faster.
"For me, is that it?" Jue was in great pain. He never imagined that his well-being two years ago was exchanged for Xue'er's eyes. All he wanted to do now was hold her tightly, so that he could feel that she was in his arms and that he could not miss her.
I took advantage of his moment of relaxation to push him away, turned my head, and whispered, "Go back. Xue'er in the Blood Tower needs you. Don't come looking for me anymore. I'm already very tired." After saying that, I left the peach blossom forest and ran towards my palace.
"Xue'er, so you knew all along." Jue lowered her eyes, her eyes filled with unbearable grief, her heart feeling as if it were suffocating. So she understood everything. But I really fell in love with you, Xue'er, I really fell in love with you.
Our love is like a song that's never finished.
We just couldn't get past that handover point.
The trials of our relationship have left us both exhausted.
When will we be able to smile and face our hearts?
Smile and say goodbye to the other person.
However, that is clearly impossible.
Because we hurt each other.
That unwavering commitment is something none of us can let go of.
————Xue'er
Chapter 104
That night was still very cold, and even more so, chilling to the bone. We had finally come to this point. I couldn't ignore his manipulation and then smile and tell myself that he loved me. The feeling of deceiving myself was truly unbearable. Now that it's out in the open, I don't feel any relief at all. Instead, it feels like there are several pieces of iron stacked in my heart, making it hard for me to breathe.
"Your Majesty, the Emperor has arrived!" Shanzhu paced back and forth at the palace gate. Upon seeing me, she immediately caught up with me, supported me, and said.
"Oh, I'll go in now." I rubbed my temples, patted my cheeks gently, and stepped into the hall.
"What brings you here tonight?" Xue Bin sat upright in the seat of honor, his brows furrowed, revealing his displeasure.
It seems that Mangosteen sent him here to prevent him from going to Consort Lan's place, and he's angry about it, so he's taking it out on me. I was already in a bad mood, and his actions have only made me more irritable.
"What's wrong? You're upset that I'm keeping you from seeing your Consort Lan, so you're throwing a tantrum here? If you really don't want to hear it, then leave. If your good Consort Lan gets taken advantage of, don't blame me for not helping her. Alright, you can go now." I waved my hand impatiently, walked to the table, sat down, picked up the teapot in the center, carefully poured a cup, and drank it all in one gulp. Hearing no footsteps, I said again, "What, aren't you leaving yet? Are you getting addicted to staying here?"
"What's wrong with you?" Xuebin moved to the chair next to me and sat down, looking at me with a puzzled expression. He no longer had the majesty of an emperor; he only had the face of a curious child.
"Mind your own business," I said, turning my head away and scoffing. I poured myself another glass of water and drank it. After a while, I felt much better.
"Fine, whatever. Then tell me, what do you want me to do here tonight?" Xuebin shook his head helplessly. Women who are angry are the most unpredictable. They can change their minds at any moment. Women are just troublesome.
"I'm pregnant," I said calmly, having composed myself.
But I remained calm, while Xuebin was anything but. He was so startled he almost fell off his chair, his eyes widened, and he swallowed hard. "What did you say? Did I hear that right? Yes, it must be. Ugh, I've been reviewing memorials so much lately that my head is spinning." He then patted his head.
"You heard me right, and you're not dizzy either. That's right, I'm pregnant." I had a mischievous urge again. I didn't expect that Mangosteen hadn't explained things to Xuebin before inviting him over. It would be a shame not to mess with him.
"What? Really? Whose? Whose?" Xuebin suddenly leaned in front of me, carefully examined my expression, and, finding nothing amiss, anxiously asked, "What's wrong with this woman? She hasn't even finished with this matter for me, and she's already gotten me pregnant. If those people find out, will my Snow Kingdom still be able to survive?"
"Yours," I uttered with utter composure, two words that made Xuebin feel as if she'd been struck by lightning.
Xuebin fell completely silent, stammering, "This, this, this, how is this possible?"
"It's yours," I was absolutely certain. If it weren't yours, how could I act out the rest of the scene? Isn't that obvious?
"You're lying!" Xuebin really felt like crying. He knew Zixue liked to tease people, but he couldn't tell she was really teasing him. He blinked his eyes pitifully and asked cautiously, "Zixue, please stop playing tricks on me, my little heart can't take it!"
"Hehe," I thought Xuebin's playful expression popped into my head, and I laughed. I reached out and touched his cheek, patting it lightly, saying, "Just kidding, but I really will get pregnant, and it has to be yours."
Xuebin breathed a sigh of relief because of what I said earlier, but what I said next made him anxious again. He lowered his head and said, "Just tell me straight, don't play games with me like this."
"Alright, aren't you supposed to be protecting your Consort Lan? This is just part of my plan. Just cooperate. What's with the coyness of a grown man?" I patted his face again (I got carried away with it).