Kapitel 45

"I have no idea."

"Then how do you know about my background?"

"There's an old story between her and me, concerning Jiang Chen's father. I'll tell you about it later. She disappeared from the martial arts world after she met me; no one has seen her since. Her fate is unknown."

"May I ask, Madam, is Jiang Chen's father named Ruiyang?"

"Yes, how did you know?"

"That's what Lord Yun said just now."

She stared at me blankly, her expression complicated.

When I came out of Madam Qi's room, I found that Jiang Chen had not left. He was standing under the corridor waiting for me, with a solemn expression on his face.

The night air was serene, carrying a refreshing coolness. A thought, like a crescent moon breaking through the clouds, drifted through my mind.

"Jiang Chen, can you give me back that gold lock?"

He frowned and asked, "You're not a stingy person. In previous years, you pawned the gold locks to buy wine and never felt a penny of heartache. Why do you keep asking for this one back? Are you really that stingy with me?"

I gave a helpless, bitter smile to myself. That time I asked for it back because I didn't want everyone to misunderstand that I had given him a token of our love. But this time, I want the token back, so I need to go to Jinbo Palace.

With my skills, forcibly breaking into Jinbo Palace would be a joke. I think if I go there with the golden lock, Murong Qiaoruo, who is there, will surely come to see me.

"Jiang Chen, I'll use it for a bit, and I'll pay you back later, okay?"

He clutched his collar, complaining, "Xiao Mo, I've given you my whole heart, I'm willing to give you anything, how can you be so stingy? This is the first thing you've ever given me, it's very meaningful, and you've asked for it back time and time again, it's so hurtful."

His appearance was both infuriating and hilarious, so I had no choice but to say, "I want to take this to see someone, and I will definitely return it to you later."

"Whom are you going to see?"

“You know.”

He said seriously, "Then I can't return it to you." After saying that, he turned around and walked towards Lanze Garden, as if afraid that I would forcibly take it from him.

I sighed helplessly and followed behind him. Once inside Lanze Garden, he went straight to his bedroom. Just as he was about to push the door open, I quickly said, "Jiang Chen, I'm not in a good mood today. Would you like to keep me company and have a drink?"

He stopped and turned back to look at me strangely: "Xiao Mo, don't you have a problem with the smell of alcohol?"

"Yes, but I'm really upset today. I'm thinking of drowning my sorrows in alcohol and getting drunk."

"If you can't even stand the smell of alcohol, how can you drink it?"

"Ah, I think, you drink, and I just sit here, smelling the alcohol, and maybe I'll get drunk too."

I can't believe I made such an unreasonable request! I secretly admire myself, and I'm so ashamed I can barely speak. Actually, well, I want him drunk so I can steal the gold lock around his neck. Sigh, it's clearly mine, and now I'm going to steal it.

"Okay." He readily agreed, which left me stunned and incredulous.

Soon, a wine stall was set up in my room, filled with the finest osmanthus fragrance.

This was Master's second favorite wine, after Xifenglie. He wasn't particular about much else, but when it came to drinking, he was quite particular about the ambiance. For example, when the wind was howling, he insisted on drinking Xifenglie; when the moon was out, he insisted on drinking Guihua Nong. When drinking alone, he would drink Xinghua Fen; when friends came over, he would drink Zhuyeqing. His wine glasses were also quite particular; he used luminous glasses for wine and coarse porcelain for Xifenglie—his style was quite varied.

Jiang Chen poured himself a drink and chatted with me casually about old times at Xiaoyao Sect. He deliberately picked out interesting things to talk about and deliberately skipped over Yunzhou. My heart was filled with bitterness and helplessness to the point of numbness. Usually, when a person is troubled by a certain person or thing, it is because there are still various possibilities and more or less hope. But today, Yun Zhishi's words were like a world-shaking axe, cutting away the last bit of hope or unwillingness in my heart until there was nothing left. He really was a former pirate fighter.

For the first time ever, I picked up a glass of wine and took a small sip. I was immediately choked and tears welled up in my eyes. Then, the tears flowed like a torrent from a burst dam.

Jiang Chen panicked and hurriedly wiped his tears with his palms, sighing as he did so, "No wonder you look so beautiful, you're all made of water. I will never let you touch a drop of alcohol again. You lost half a pound of water after just one sip of wine, what a huge loss."

His words made me want to laugh, and as I curled my lips, tears slid into my mouth, tasting bitter.

Twice I shed tears, but he neither asked nor mentioned it, pretending not to know the reason. Through his misty eyes, I knew his heart was clear. I was not unmoved by this affection.

Sometimes, I wonder why, despite Jiang Chen's excellence in every way, I've never considered being with him. Perhaps it's because I've always lacked a sense of belonging and security. During Mid-Autumn Festival and Lunar New Year's Eve, when families gather for celebration, my fellow disciples in the Xiaoyao Sect happily return home, while I am homeless and usually spend the holidays at my great-uncle's house with my master.

But no matter how beautiful the secluded mountain villa is, it's not my home; no matter how good my master is, he's not my father. I always long for a home of my own, even if it's poor and dilapidated, as long as it provides shelter from the wind and rain, and is warm and peaceful. And the person who holds my hand and protects me for life must make me feel at ease. In this vast world, amidst countless uncertainties, he only cares about me.

Holding onto this infatuation, the first person I saw when my heart first opened to love was Yunzhou. Like my master, he inexplicably inspired a sense of dependence. Yet, he was my brother, the person I least wanted to be family.

This cruel twist of fate leaves me with nothing but sighs. My master often said that eight or nine out of ten things in life don't go as planned, so where is my one or two out of ten?

Jiang Chen's warm fingers gently wiped away the tears on my chin. Touched, I felt a little guilty, so I walked to the window, looked up at the sky, and whispered, "Why is there no moon tonight?"

This phrase serves a similar purpose to "The sun is really blinding today"—looking up at the night sky makes tears flow back into your heart.

Jiang Chen said softly, "The moon is hidden behind the clouds right now, so why don't we invite it with wine?"

He picked up the wine cup and wine pot, and took my hand, leading me into the courtyard. There was a stone table and benches in front of the swing, and a cool evening breeze rustled the leaves.

I sat on the stone bench, watching Jiang Chen drink one cup after another. He was elegant and composed, drinking as if it were tea, without even flinching when he downed a drink. I had no idea that he could hold his liquor so well.

My master always puts on an air of a wine connoisseur, but in reality, he gets drunk after just a dozen or so cups. Jiang Chen, on the other hand, has an astonishingly low alcohol tolerance! Actually, I'm in a bad mood today, and so is he. While I'm feeling down, he's probably feeling just as turbulent. My attempt to drown my sorrows in alcohol is a pretense, but his seems genuinely so.

As the wine jug was emptied of its last drop, Jiang Chen smiled at me and said, "Xiao Mo, are you drunk? If you're not drunk soon, I'm going to get drunk."

However, his eyes shone as brightly as the stars in the night sky, and there was not a trace of drunkenness in them.

I asked hesitantly, "Are you really drunk? Even Master goes to sleep when he's drunk. Do you want to go to sleep too?"

"Xiao Mo, don't you know that everyone's drunken state is very different? Master likes to cover his head and sleep soundly, Seventh Uncle likes to sing loudly while drumming on a basin, and He Xiaole likes to lay his secret stash of money on the bed and count it over and over again."

"And what about you?"

He chuckled and said, "I like to have late-night conversations with my drinking buddies by candlelight, and then sleep side by side with them."

Right now, it seems I'm his drinking buddy. Upon hearing the words "sleeping side by side," I immediately felt guilty and breathless, and hurriedly got up and said, "I, I'll go to sleep first."

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