Lu Liu looked at him, gently squatted down beside him, and held Yan hope's slender white fingers. He asked, "Can't we go back to the past from the future? The past without Wen Heng, really, we can't?"
Yan hope opened his eyes, his pupils dark and bright, innocent yet mocking.
He wrote a few words: "Did we have a past, Lu Liu?"
Lu Liu looked at his words, touched them gently, and laughed. He stood up calmly, took out a handkerchief, wiped the ink stains off his hands, and casually threw it away. "I will make you remember," he said slowly.
Yan hope also smiled, his lips parted slightly, his voice hoarse and unpleasant. He said, "Lu Liu, are you sure what you feel for me is love?"
Lu Liu pushed his wheelchair, bowed his head and smiled – I have no choice. In this world, no one is more compatible with me than you.
In September, his leg was feeling a little better, and a well-known domestic newspaper wanted to interview DJ YAN, who had left the entertainment industry to live as a normal man.
Yan hope declined several times, but Lu Liu imprisoned him in the apartment. Where could he go?
Later, I was tempted and thought it was an opportunity, so I talked to Lu Liu about it. I didn't have much hope, but to my surprise, he agreed.
I told Dayi in advance where I would be meeting the reporter.
The reporter was a veteran journalist with extensive experience. He had interviewed Yan hope before, and the two were acquaintances.
He was holding a sketchbook when he saw Yan hope. He adjusted his glasses and looked surprised—"What happened to you?"
Yan hope laughed, his voice still hoarse and unpleasant. "I think you can ask me something else. I have another appointment in an hour."
Although surprised, the reporter nodded and said, "Okay. Your fans are eager to know how you're doing, or why you left back then, when you were at the height of your popularity, with a fan club of nearly half a million people."
Yan hope thought for a moment and said, "At that time, there were things I wanted to accomplish more than work."
Is it more important than 500,000 followers?
I'm sorry, but yes, it's true. The existence of 500,000 followers is for DJ YAN, which is an immense honor. However, I'll reserve my badge of honor for my woman.
Do you... have someone you like? Is it Chu Yun?
Although... everyone has been hoping for this kind of ending, let me put it this way: if I hadn't met Chu Yun as DJ Yan, perhaps I would have fallen in love with her. We were both true to our professional ethics, and I believe she was well aware of that as well.
It seems that this isn't easily accepted. So, this person isn't in the entertainment industry anymore. Can you talk about the woman you like? I've been hearing rumors lately that you have a close relationship with Lu Liu, the young master of the Lu family, and that you've crossed the line. Is saying you have a woman you like just a pretext?
Lu Liu and I have been best friends since childhood. As for that woman, although we've known each other for eight years, it's only been eight years. Calling her "the woman I like" isn't really appropriate. If I were to be honest, Lu Liu and I might just make do as best friends for the rest of our lives. But she exists, and that's giving me a real headache.
Eight years, that's a long time. What kind of woman is she? She seems to make you feel... helpless.
I've spent a long time trying to resist being less close to her, but clearly, it's been difficult. I'm a rather selfish and cold person to a large extent, but for her, I've done so many things that even I find myself incredibly adorable.
I heard that DJ YAN spent a long time working on a picture book before resigning. Your drawing skills have always been excellent. So, is this picture book going to be published?
This picture album is a personal item. Perhaps, in the future, I will bring my wife and show it to everyone.
Is it related to that woman?
No, they were abstract things, unrelated to her, but related to certain feelings. Passion, love, brightness, coldness, bitterness, timidity—things that were too extreme, yet felt in a continuous flow. That child, being a rigid and dull person, probably wouldn't understand.
DJ YAN, I hope one day I can attend your wedding with her.
Yan hope smiled and took his hand; this was her best blessing.
After exchanging a few more polite words with the reporter, the interview ended. Da Yi, crouching low, ran out from the other side of the coffee shop. Just as the two awkward kids met up, Lu Liu walked over with a half-smile.
Behind him followed Sun Peng, dressed in a white suit with a carefree smile.
He looked at Yan hope, his dark eyes filled with a smile, nonchalant and carefree. He pinched Yan hope's cheek and said, "Oh, Young Master Yan, how did you get so thin?"
Lu Liu shook his head and smiled faintly. "He hasn't been eating all day. Next time, I'm going to find someone to give him an IV drip of nutrients."
The second half of the sentence carried a threatening tone.
He turned around and said, "Da Yi's here too. Where are you all headed?" I just ran into Sun Peng. It's a coincidence that we haven't seen each other in a long time. How about we have a meal together?
Xin Dayi looked at him, her face cold and hard, and said, "No need, I'm afraid you'll poison me."
In the blink of an eye, he took out a book, handed it to Yan hope, and said, "This is the book you asked me to find, a book specifically for dealing with lines and shading."
Lu Liu raised an eyebrow and stretched out his fair and slender hand. "What, you've suddenly remembered to look at these things? Didn't you stop reading basic books a long time ago when you were learning to paint with Professor Su from M University?"
Yan hope casually handed him the book.
Looking at Yan hope's expression, Lu Liu smiled as he saw the book in Yan Xi's hand, which seemed heavy and genuine, without even turning the pages. He handed it to Yan Xi, gently took his hand, and said, "It's time for lunch. Let's go."
Sun Peng squinted his peach blossom eyes, stared at the gold-embossed book for a long time before looking away. He then looked at Yan hope with a half-smile and pinched Yan hope's left cheek.
Yan hope hit him on the head with a book. "Sun Peng, are you out of your mind? You pinch my face every time you see me. You've had this problem since you were a child. You're crazy."
Sun Peng cleared his throat, turned his head, smiled, nodded, and said, "Yes, that's me."
Lu Liu glanced at Sun Peng, his gaze deep and dark, unfathomable.
They sat together eating. Yan hope lazily mashed the steak but didn't touch it, only occasionally sipping a couple of sips of juice. Lu Liu and Sun Peng were talking.
I heard that you are applying for company establishment and preparing for IPO. When will you be listed?
Sun Peng said, "Yan hope, you just swallowed a fly."
Yan hope's face turned green. Ah.
Taking advantage of the gap in his open mouth, Sun Peng stuffed a large piece of tenderly cut meat into his mouth, smiling and saying, "I was just kidding."
Yan hope chewed twice indignantly and swallowed.
Sun Peng laughed, "Yan hope, your life is built on the goal of becoming a pig."
Yan hope's voice was hoarse and disdainful. "Who made that decision?"
He said, "I made the decision."
Turning around, he smiled politely and replied to Lu Liu, "After I make a fortune in a while, I will go public."
When Yan hope was brought back to the apartment, Lu Liu had a board meeting that afternoon, so he instructed his bodyguards and left.
Yan hope took out the book, his palms were sweaty.
This is not a book, or rather, it is just a box with its core hollowed out, but its exterior looks just like a book.
Yan hope recognized it at a glance, because there were only six original copies of this book left on the market, and they were all in a bad state, hidden in libraries, and would never be this brand new.
This is how Dayi conveyed the message to him.
Fortunately, Lu Liu had no interest in painting techniques.
When Yan hope opened it, there was a letter and a file bag inside.
He unfolded the letter.
Yan hope:
Zhan Xin'an.
It has been more than four months since I left. I hope everything is well at home.
The weather in Paris is always lovely. It's summer now, and the flowers are in full bloom. My landlady told me that the winters are usually quite mild, unlike in City B, where the city is covered in snow.
I live in the 11th arrondissement, very close to the research institute. It's only five metro stops away, but walking to the station takes thirty minutes, which is quite inconvenient. I've gained a lot of weight recently. The cheese and bread in Paris taste strange, but once you get used to it, it's addictive, just like the city itself.
That's fine, it'll help me lose weight. Most men in the world, except for you (because you rarely notice my appearance), don't like Ah Heng's barrel-shaped waist.
I bought a trench coat for only thirty-five euros. My landlady took me to buy it, and the price was acceptable.
When I arrived at the research institute, the doctors gave me a living allowance of 300 euros, a white work uniform, and even a Bible.
The landlady's son, eight-year-old Isu, said to me, "Wenny, this is the word of God, you should read it."
The little boy, wearing a large coat made from his father's clothes, dragged on the ground. He told me he wanted to be Sherlock Holmes. I folded a paper pipe for him, and he kept it in his mouth all day long, asking me if I wanted to be Watson.
I think this is great; it can be a profession in the future.
If one day you can't find me in City B, it's not because I'm bothered by your words about never coming back; it's just that I've probably become Watson, Sherlock Holmes, and won't be going back.
Don't worry about it.
Perhaps you will still come home occasionally. Since you left the courtyard unused, I have been bored in my spare time, so I planted a garden full of sunflowers. Although I dare not say that I have devoted myself to caring for them every day, the first thing I do when I return home is to look at them. Now, three years have passed, and the flowering season is almost here.
Do you still remember Chu Yun? She was the first woman you were so close to after you grew up. She once said that her favorite person was a man like a sunflower. That description is very fitting for you.
Sunflowers. Golden and radiant, their eyes sparkle with a beautiful light when they smile, always turned towards the sun.
As for me, I always love to face the sunflower.
Of the thousands of people in the world, it's lamentable that everyone has their own quirks, and it's not as surprising as one. Once you see them all, they become less unusual.
Yanxi, I think I've finally found a place where I can shout your name loudly without anyone glancing at me.
They don't understand Chinese.
I don't understand what those two words mean to me.
I wish you well, yet I know not how you are doing. Since you met Wen Heng, you've never given me a single second of your trust; you only trust yourself. That's why you were willing to rely on your own strength to save Da Yi. But you don't know that just a minute before you made that call, Chen Juan called, asking me to calm you down. He said he was willing to fight Lu Liu to the end for Da Yi. I wonder, did your outburst fulfill Lu Liu's wish, or your own?
I know you said those things because you were afraid I'd be hurt by Lu Liu, but I've already said I'd only forgive you once, and I have no regrets. Besides, you dared to run into the truck, disregarding your own life. If I were really with you, with your courage, how much more likely would Wen Heng become a widow?
Furthermore, I said I was willing to support a disabled man, even if you were crippled and had to crawl to see me, I would still support you. But, given your calculating nature, would you dare to believe me?
I long for your well-being. I think of you, so indecisive for so many years, still entangled with Lu Liu, perhaps harboring some wish for a long and happy marriage. Wen Heng has no intention of interfering. I wish you and Lu Liu could sit in a room with a fireplace, grow old together, recite your favorite poems, look at your paintings, and gaze at each other with tender affection until death do you part.
The day before I left the country, my grandfather gave me something—evidence he had gathered about the Lu family over the years, which he had kept hidden until now, in preparation for a final showdown. I begged for so long, pleading for a future for us, but you never believed me for a second. Now that it's no longer needed, I'm having Da Yi give it all away, hoping that although you and Lu Liu are close, you won't become obstacles to each other.
Since I met you, I have only wished that all lovers in the world could be united in marriage. Now, my heart is at peace.
Don't worry about it.
Wen Heng
September 2006
Chapter 103
This was a catastrophe.
When you stumbled into my...second half of life.
————————————Epigraph
In mid-October, during his fifth month in France, Ah Heng was working on a research report—a microbiological assessment of the transmission routes of AIDS.
Her doctor, Edward, a blond American man, said to her, "Wenny, wouldn't it be more effective to change the topic to a moral observation about the transmission routes of AIDS, and to awaken the foolish masses?" Medicine, sometimes, is the best substitute for shifting the world's focus.